twirled me instead. Safe and easy.
We sat as the DJ announced the newlyweds, but I stared only at Nate’s vacant seat. My heart pounded. I had no idea what I’d say to him when I finally had the chance to face him, but I couldn’t hide how I felt anymore. I spent nearly three months denying my feelings to everyone, including myself. It did nothing but cause problems.
If I wanted a relationship with Nate…that meant confronting every mistake, every insecurity, and every fear head on.
It took a pregnancy for me to learn that lesson, but it was going to stick.
I wanted Nate, and nothing was going to stop me from getting him.
Except a lack of booze.
The DJ promised that the alcohol was on its way, and the caterers did their best with lemonade and water. I sucked on my ginger ale and chewed the straw as I waited for him to return.
At least the reception looked amazing. A field of tables with white tablecloths lined the party, and we had enough room for a big dancing area. As an additional perk, the church had a small playground to entertain the kids running amuck.
Everyone sat to watch Lindsey and Bryce’s first dance—not the crazy Dirty Dancing routine she planned, but, to my surprise, Bryce’s favorite song. The held each other close and swayed to the music.
I had no doubt that it would be my sister’s favorite part of her special day.
It was the first time I was envious of Lindsey.
Dinner was served before Nate returned. I picked over the vegetarian meal, actually enjoying the polenta and mushrooms. I wasn’t hungry though. I bit my lip until it was raw and shredded my napkin under the table.
I popped out of my seat the instant I saw the glint of sunlight strike the metal kegs. Nate carried in more alcohol than we could possibly serve, and he earned a rancorous applause. He took a bow and laughed, but he searched only for me.
This was it.
I had to confront him. He had to know how I felt.
I slipped away from the table.
Then someone handed Lindsey a microphone. She grabbed my wrist before I escaped.
“Everyone…” My sister pouted until she had everyone’s undivided attention. “I want to thank you all for coming on this special day.”
The guests applauded. A few people tapped their glasses with their spoons, and Lindsey grabbed Bryce by the collar to haul him in for a kiss. It earned another round of cheers.
“I know traditionally everyone is supposed to toast me…”
Reflexively, the bridesmaids and I clamored over the table to find anything to raise in her honor. Carmen spilled her water, grabbed a candle, and set the tablecloth on fire. I lifted both my drink and Rick’s, which, coincidentally, helped to put out the flames.
Lindsey took the drink from Bryce’s hand and continued.
“But I’d like to make my own toast,” she said. “There is one person I want to thank more than anyone in this world. The one who stood by me. Indulged my every request. Told me when I was being unreasonable but still tried to please me. The one who put me first before anything else.”
Bryce grinned, but Lindsey turned to me.
“My sister is the greatest friend anyone could have. Thank you, Mandy. None of this could have happened without you.”
Well, I couldn’t run away now.
I hugged my sister. Lindsey relished the applause, but she pulled back and crinkled her nose.
“Now hurry up with your toast. You have to help me go to the bathroom.”
Oh, great.
Lindsey and Bryce held hands as I delivered a much abbreviated speech, wishing Lindsey a lifetime of happiness and Bryce all the luck in the world. Rick stood, keeping his short.
“To the newlyweds—we’ve been friends our whole lives, and nothing makes me happier than seeing everyone together. I wish us all the best in our new relationships. We are very fortunate that our group is so strong, passionate, and above all else, protective…even to a fault.”
Rick touched his cheek. Bryce laughed and earned a smack from Lindsey.
“But that just means we love each other as friends, sisters, brothers, and, finally, couples. Let’s never forget that.”
Glasses clinked, and Rick pulled me into a warm hug. I peeked over his shoulder. Nate waited at the bar, arms crossed. He had helped to tap the keg and serve the initial drinks, but now he was free.
And so was I.
This was really it.
I made it two steps before Lindsey dragged me to the bathroom.
Goddamn it. This wasn’t happening.