down for a nap after she ate. She’s growing up so fast,” Anne said. She held the small box within her grasp and seeing it made Robin feel a little woozy.
“I don’t know if I can do this.”
“You can do whatever the hell you want to do to.” Anne sat down in the bedroom beside her bed. “There’s no pressure here.”
“It sure feels like it.”
“Only because you’re putting it on yourself.” Anne placed the box down. “See, you don’t have to take it. Nothing bad will happen. All you’ll be doing is prolonging the answer, and believe me, that’s no biggie.”
Robin didn’t make a move to pick it up. She kept debating with herself what she should or shouldn’t do. To not take the test would mean she didn’t have to worry about any of the answers. If she took the test, it would be a struggle to know and how to deal with it. She put a hand across her stomach, wondering what the hell to do.
“Why aren’t you forcing me to take this test and to stop being a baby?” she asked.
“It’s not my job to do this, Robin. I’m your friend. Your best friend, I don’t want to force you to do anything.” Anne sat there. “You know, when I took my first test, Elijah wasn’t even there for me.”
“He wasn’t?”
“Nope. He made me take the test all on my own. He told me to come over if it’s a yes, and if I didn’t turn up, he’d know we were in the clear.” Anne laughed.
“You married this man?”
Anne snorted. “Yeah, I married him. I was young, stupid, and I really thought I was in love with him. We’d been together forever and well, I guess I thought he was the one. I’m such a loser, right?”
“You’re not a loser. If I’m being totally honest, I thought Bishop would’ve been the guy I settled down with. There are times I wish we didn’t lose our friendship, you know, but the more I think about it, it wasn’t a real friendship. Bishop thought he owned me because of what was expected of us. You can’t build anything on that, and when our friendship was tested, he pushed me away.” She shrugged. “He failed epically.”
“He’s not the only friend you’ve got, Robin. Not anymore.”
Robin sighed. “I need to know the answer. I need to know what to do.”
“I’m here for you.”
She picked up the box and disappeared into the bathroom. The last time she took one of these, her hands had been shaking so badly, just like they were now. Time or circumstance didn’t seem to change this. Why couldn’t men go through this? This was torture, and maybe men would learn the truth about how scary it was to face taking a test all on your own.
Taking a deep breath, she tried to focus, but it was so hard. Without looking at her reflection, she read through the instructions, complied with each one, and then stood waiting, gripping the edge of the sink as her future was decided.
Anne came in and took her hand as the stick showed them what she was going to have to do, and as it did, she felt a little sick to her stomach.
“It’s going to be okay, Robin.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I know Preacher is in love with you, and he will only ever see this as a good thing, and I think you should as well.”
****
Sitting in the graveyard early in the morning wasn’t exactly the best way to start a day. Robin sat on the cold, wooden bench. It was slightly damp from some rain the previous night, but she didn’t care about the water, or the damp, or her clothes. Instead, she stared out at the graves. She read the ones closest to her, and she saw final resting places for moms, dads, aunts, sisters, so many people. So much life and of course, death.
Tears filled her eyes, and she didn’t even know why she was here. There was no one for her to come and see. Her mother didn’t get this luxury, nor did O’Klaren. She’d seen some of O’Klaren’s family and they seemed to be doing a lot better without the man. He’d been a true monster. Beating his wife, hurting his kids. Sure, to the outside world, he’d painted a pretty picture but the very truth was one of misery.
Pain was something she was coming to know quite well.
“I have to say it’s a shock to see