his shoulders roll forward as defeat washed over him. “How I feel doesn’t matter, does it?”
His grandfather shook his head slowly. “If it doesn’t matter, then you should move on. The Season will start in a few months. You are, as you always have been, a catch. And it is time for you to take a bride and begin to cement your legacy. You know that.”
Cav bent his head. He would be thirty just before the next Season began. And though he wasn’t titled, he did still have responsibilities. His grandfather, his uncle…they had been very patient with him, but he could see the firmness in the marquess’s stare. The steel that would eventually come out and demand Cav move on, rather than suggest it.
“I know you’re right,” he said softly.
He expected his grandfather to smile, but instead the marquess looked…troubled at his acquiescence. As if he expected something more. Something different.
At last his grandfather turned away and paced back to the chair he’d abandoned. He sat back down. “Good. Very good. Well, you’ll go to her party then, I suppose. And this will be your last chance if you want to press your friendship to something more.”
Cav’s knees actually went weak at that thought, and he gripped the mantel to steady himself. He hadn’t thought of it in those terms before, but it was true. If he agreed to seriously pursue a match in the spring, that did mean this would be the last party he would attend where he would serve as Emily’s confidante. It wouldn’t be fair to any woman he would court or marry to carry on as close as they were. To keep being head over heels in love with her. He would have to find a way to distance himself for survival.
Was that what he wanted? To break away from Emily without ever trying to push for more? To keep his love wrapped away from her as a way to protect her? Protect himself?
He wasn’t certain of the answer. But he would have to become so within the next few weeks. Because once he was at her party, the temptation of being near her was going to overwhelm him, as it always did. But was this the time to let her see the heart he hid? And what would she do if she saw it at last?
Chapter 2
A partridge in a pear tree
Emily was all but quivering with anticipation as she watched a slow line of carriages glide through her gate at the end of the lane. The great manor her in-laws were kind enough to still allow her to use had grounds so vast that it was not a short distance from the gate to the house. But in a few moments, all her guests would reach her and she would begin the task of matching them with those she hoped would become the loves of their lives!
But who to match with whom? That was a question she had been pondering at length for weeks. A question that kept her heart and mind filled when sadness or loneliness crept in. A distraction, perhaps, but what was wrong with that?
She shook her head and refocused on matters at hand. Another question that plagued her was how to manage six couples falling madly in love and keep the holiday fun high. Each day of the gathering was carefully planned, of course, but she also wished to leave room for spontaneity. How could anyone sneak off to kiss in the orangery or dance in the moonlight if their every second was planned to the letter?
She sighed. She was getting ahead of herself, an old habit she recognized but sometimes had a difficult time breaking. For now she would focus on the present moment and enjoy her guests’ arrival.
“You should calm yourself,” Cav said as he joined her on the stair in her vigil on the approaching carriages. “You’ll frighten them all away with that mad mask you’re wearing.”
She lifted her hands to her cheeks and found them hot. “Is it very mad?”
His smile gentled. “Of course not. You are never anything but lovely. But I do worry they’ll suspect your intentions for them in a heartbeat.”
Emily glanced up at him. Cav had arrived ahead of all the others that morning, all smiles and teasing and promises to help her in any way she needed. She’d been nervous beforehand, pacing and questioning herself about this plan. But once he was there at her side? The worries had