I could have said no. I should have said no. Instead, I took the easy way out. Choosing my career, my future, over my family.
The Ravens might have won the championship, but the win was bitter because I knew what I sacrificed in order to get there.
“You can’t put your life on hold for me.” She gives me a hard stare and then turns to Jade to do the same. “Neither of you can do that. I won’t let you.”
Tears pool in my sister’s eyes, but there is also fury. The plates rattle as she puts them down on the counter with more force than necessary. “You can’t ask me to leave you.”
Mom gets up and goes to her, wrapping her arm around her. “I’m not asking you to leave, I’m asking you to live.”
Jade closes her eyes, her throat bobbing as she swallows, trying to keep her emotions in check. One lone tear slips down her cheek regardless.
“I can come back home,” I offer, but before I can finish the sentence, Mom’s stern gaze turns to me. “No.”
Her tone is non-negotiable as she says it. Like just the idea of it is unimaginable. Not that I expected anything different.
“Then you have to let me hire a nurse.”
“I already have a nurse.”
“Around the clock care,” I correct, looking her straight in the eyes. I need her to understand this. How important it is. She can’t ask me to go away and expect me not to worry. “I don’t want to hear anything more about accidental falls.”
Mom sighs, the sound more tired than irritated. “I don’t want anybody hovering over me all the time, Nixon. Not…” She swallows. “Not yet, not when I can do it myself. I want you to live, but I also need to do the same.”
While she still can.
She doesn’t say it, but I can hear it.
Mom’s been declining rapidly since Christmas. She lost her appetite and with it a significant amount of weight. There are days when she’s in so much pain she stays in bed all day, but there are still some days when she feels better, like today, and it’s almost like she’s coming back to us. But those days are further and further apart.
“No hovering,” I promise.
She looks at me for a long while, but then finally nods her agreement. I exhale slowly. It feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Jumping to my feet, I go to Mom and Jade and wrap my arms around them, pressing my lips against Mom’s forehead. “You know I worry, right? I just want to keep you safe.”
Mom throws her arm around my shoulder and with the other pulls Jade in tighter for a group hug. “I know. And I love you for it.”
“I love you too, Mom.”
We hold each other for a while longer. Mom’s the first to let go. She wipes at her cheeks, and puts a smile on her face. “Go on, you have to get that girl of yours back to campus.”
Giving her one final kiss on the head, I pull back. “I’ll be calling the nurses once I get back to campus.”
She rolls her eyes. “As if you’d forget.”
“You’re damn right.” Rubbing my hands on the sides of my legs I look toward the doorway. “I guess I’ll go and get Yasmin.”
“You do that.” She pats me on the cheek with a smile. Neither of us misses the fact that I didn’t correct her.
“I guess that’s it,” Yasmin says as soon as I pull in and park in front of her dorm an hour later.
The drive back to school passed in silence. My mind was everywhere at once, thinking about all the things that I need to take care of to ensure Mom, and Jade by extension, are taken care of.
Yasmin could either sense that I needed time or she has her own things to worry about, because she let me be.
“Thanks for bringing me here,” she says, offering me a small smile.
“No thanks needed, I was the one after all who… Shit! The car. Why didn’t you say anything?”
“You seemed like you had a lot on your mind.” She shrugs. “It’s no big deal, really.”
“That’s no excuse. You should have reminded me. First I basically kidnap you, and now I left you stranded.”
“It’s fine. It’s not like I need the car anyway.”
I give her a skeptical look.
“Much,” she corrects. “It’s not like I need the car much anyway.”
“Give me your keys.” I extend my hand.
She looks at it,