then,” I said. I leaned down and kissed Mila’s forehead. “I love you, darling.”
“I love you too, Silas.”
Leaving that room was one of the hardest things I ever had to do.
I walked around the corner and out of the emergency room area to a waiting area.
There they all were.
Tyler and Crosby jumped up first.
Theresa pushed between them, running at me.
Olivia stood up, holding Lucy’s hand.
Edith, Thomas, and Zeke.
Claire and even Jace was there, wearing his police uniform.
“How is she?” Theresa asked. “How’s the baby?”
“The doctor said she’s checking everything out,” I said. “Uh, I don’t know… it’s all moving so slow…”
“Is she in pain still?” Tyler asked.
“Doesn’t seem it right now,” I said. “She might be hiding it. She asked me to come give you an update.”
“Hey,” Crosby said. “No news is good news, Silas.”
“What about the heartbeat?” Theresa asked.
Her eyes were big and scared.
“Yeah,” I said. “Yeah. We heard it. Doctor said it’s a strong heartbeat.”
“Those Justa hearts are like that,” Zeke called out.
“And I bet the Rhodes ones are too,” Crosby said, throwing a playful fist at my shoulder.
I nodded. “Yeah. That’s… Mila is strong. She’s…”
I turned and took a few steps away from everyone.
I blinked and the room suddenly started to spin.
As I widened my feet, I reached for a chair that wasn’t there.
“Shit,” Crosby said.
He jumped to my side and grabbed me.
I heard Lucy whisper Uncle Crosby cursed…
Then Olivia said Not now, okay?
Lucy asked Is my baby cousin okay?
My stomach felt like it was in a big knot. The biggest knot I ever felt.
I gritted my teeth and wanted to scream.
“I’ve got you, brother,” Crosby whispered to me.
My knees gave out and I felt myself going down to the floor.
“I’m right here too, Silas,” Tyler’s voice said.
My ass touched the floor and I stared forward at a perfectly good chair I could have sat in.
“Let’s give them a second here,” Zeke said. “Come on, everyone let’s go for a quick walk. Thomas, lead them on…”
“Talk to me, Silas,” Crosby said. “Don’t fight it. Come on, brother.”
“Don’t make me kick your ass again,” Tyler said.
I turned my head and gritted my teeth. “You’re lucky you have a kid… I would have rearranged your face…”
Before I could say anything else, the feeling from my stomach moved up into my chest.
I coughed once.
“I can’t lose her,” I said. “I can’t lose Mila. I can’t lose my baby either. I can’t fucking do it, man. I can’t look her in the eyes and see pain. I don’t want to fucking feel it either. I can’t fucking do this…”
“Hey, you heard the heartbeat,” Crosby said.
“That doesn’t mean shit, man,” I said. My lips fluttered and I started to blubber. “It means fucking shit.”
I thought about Tyler.
What he must have gone through.
Losing a baby… at birth…
I looked at him again and tears spilled from my eyes.
“I’m so sorry, Tyler,” I said. “How the fuck do you deal with this kind of shit?”
Tyler slid a hand to the back of my head. “You just do, Silas. And you don’t do it alone. Look, if I wanted you out of here, I’d make a few calls and you’d be gone. You and I throwing fists like that? That’s respect. Just don’t fucking leave my sister and we’re good. You got that, brother? You don’t ever fucking leave. You be bigger than anything you know from your past.”
“And we’ve got your back,” Crosby said.
“Ah, fuck,” I said. “Fuck…”
Tyler pulled me toward his shoulder.
I had never cried on another man’s shoulder before in my life. And of all people… fucking Tyler Justa.
Crosby held my right shoulder with strength.
“Now here’s what you do,” Tyler said to me. “You remember you have us. You have me. You have Crosby. Okay? And then you pick yourself up and wipe your ugly face off and go back in that room and stand there like the goddamn warrior my sister deserves to have at her side.”
“Fucking right, man,” I said. “I fucking love that woman more than I’ve ever loved anything or anyone ever in my life.”
“Good,” Tyler said. “Now go do the hard shit. Because that’s what makes love strong. It’s the hard shit. The really hard shit.”
I looked at Crosby. He nodded. “Listen to him, brother. He’s the expert on this stuff. If you need advice on a toxic one-night stand, then I’m your guy.”
I laughed. “Those I’m good at. This shit…”
I sighed and pulled my feet to my ass and stood up.
Tyler and Crosby stood up with me.
They