tell when it's too much until it's too late. One tipple always seems to lead to another.
The kitchen heat washed over me and soaked into the flannel shirt, and I felt like the pie, sitting in the oven, steaming. I struggled out of the flannel shirt, put my head down on the table, and fell asleep. I had a dream that it was summer, and I was baking on the beach in Point Pleasant. Hot sand under me, and hot sun above me. And my skin all brown and crispy like pie crust. When I woke up the pie was out of the oven, and the house smelled like heaven. And my mother had ironed my shirt.
"Do you ever eat the dessert first?" I asked my mother.
She looked at me dumbfounded. As if I'd asked whether she ritually sacrificed cats every Wednesday at the stroke of midnight.
"Suppose you were home alone," I said, "and there was a strawberry shortcake in the refrigerator and a meatloaf in the oven. Which would you eat first?"
My mother thought about it for a minute, her eyes wide. "I can't remember ever eating dinner alone. I can't even imagine it."
I buttoned myself into the shirt and slipped into my denim jacket. "I have to go. I have work to do."
"You could come to dinner tomorrow night," my mother said. "You could bring your grandmother and Joseph. I'm making a pork roast and mashed potatoes."
"Okay, but I don't know about Joe."
I got to the front door and saw that the carpet car was parked behind the Buick.
"Now what?" my mother asked. "Who are those men in that weird car?"
"Habib and Mitchell."
"Why are they parked here?"
"They're following me, but don't worry about it. They're okay."
"What do you mean, 'Don't worry about it'? What kind of thing is that to say to a mother. Of course, I'll worry about it. They look like thugs." My mother pushed past me, walked up to the car, and rapped on the window.
The window slid down and Mitchell looked out at my mother. "How ya doin?" he asked.
"Why are you following my daughter?"
"Did she tell you we're following her? She shouldn't have done that. We don't like to worry mothers."
"I have a gun in the house, and I'll use it if I have to," my mother said.
"Jeez, lady, you don't have to get your panties all in a bunch," Mitchell said. "What is it with this family? Everybody's always so hostile. We're just following your kid around a little."
"I have your license plate number," my mother said. "If anything happens to my daughter I'll tell the police all about you."
Mitchell pressed the window button and his window slid closed.
"You don't really have a gun, do you?" I asked my mother.
"I just said that to throw a scare into them."
"Hmm. Well, thanks. I'm sure I'll be okay now."
"Your father could pull some strings and get you a good job at the Personal Products plant," my mother said. "Evelyn Nagy's girl is working there, and she gets three weeks' paid vacation."
I tried to visualize Wonder Woman working the line at the Personal Products plant, but the picture wouldn't finetune. "I don't know," I said. "I don't think I have a future in Personal Products." I got into Big Blue and waved goodbye to my mother.
She gave Mitchell one last warning glare and returned to her house.
"She's going through the change," I said to Bob. "She gets excited. Nothing to worry about."
I DROVE OVER to the office with Mitchell and Habib tagging along behind.
Lula looked out the storefront window when Bob and I swung through the door. "Looks like those two idiots got a carpet car."
"Yeah. They've been with me since the crack of dawn. They tell me their employer's losing patience with the Ranger hunt."
"He's not the only one," Vinnie said from his inner office. "Joyce is turning up a big fat nothing on Ranger, and I'm feeling an ulcer coming on. Not to mention, I'm in for big bucks with Morris Munson. You better get your ass out there and find that creep."
With any luck Munson was in Tibet by now and I'd neverfind him. "Anything new?" I asked Connie.
"Nothing you want to know about."
"Tell her anyway. This is a good one," Lula said.
"Last night Vinnie bonded out a guy named Douglas Kruper. Kruper sold a car to the fifteen-year-old daughter of one of our illustrious state senators. On the way home from buying the car the kid got picked up for running