and shove them into my pockets. My strides are larger than normal, the outrage apparent no matter how much I’d like to hide it. As I pass the rows of desks, I know they can see me. The real me, but in this moment, I can’t suppress it. I can only move faster and leave before I turn around and do something I’ll truly regret.
Chapter 4
Arianna
Whack!
A strangled cry escapes my lips as my head falls backward, the stinging pain racing up my ass cheeks, spreading out to my lower back and traveling downward through my thighs. Fuck. It hurts.
My breath comes out in short gasps as I try to bear the wave of stinging aftershocks, my face twisted into a tight mask of pain. I try to remember to give my worries to Danny. To relax and trust him that the pain will give me pleasure in the end. It’s all for a reason. Everything happens for a reason and I deserve this, but in the end, it'll be alright.
That’s what I used to tell myself, and it did bring me relief in the past. At times, I even looked forward to it. I deserved this, and the end result made a weight lift from me. It was freeing. But not now. It’s only mind-numbing agony now.
My heart skips a beat as I sense movement. And I brace for another one. But it doesn’t come right away.
I can hear Danny behind me, his breathing deep and ragged, stalking me like I’m a wild animal that needs to be put down. But he doesn’t have to do that. I’m chained to the wall, my hands cuffed above my head, my bare ass behind me, giving him complete access. He just likes doing this. He likes building the anticipation of a hit, but never striking until I least expect it.
I hate it. As I wait for his next blow, I can’t remember what I used to think about during these times. I don’t remember them. It wasn’t like this.
I wait in agony, my limbs taut and sweaty, knowing the next one is coming, even if I don't know when. I hear his footsteps move to my right side and then to my left. Then I sense him directly behind me. The sound of his breathing fills my ears and my heart pounds faster. It’s coming. Everything goes silent.
A drop of sweat runs down my forehead, down my nose, all the way down my chin and drops to the plush carpet below. I swear my heart is about to race out of my chest as I wait, thumping so loud that I know he hears it. I feel dizzy as I grip the chains, bracing myself for what’s to come.
“You’re holding back,” his voice calls out from behind me. My body relaxes at his words. I am. He knows me so well. “You need to give in,” he tells me.
My head hangs in shame. This is my fault. I used to be ready for this, willing to give him my pain and it would make me feel better.
An animalistic grunt splits the air, followed by multiple lashes.
A tortured scream tears from my throat. Agony becomes my existence, my ass, thighs and lower back radiating a pain so strong my knees buckle. The hard cast iron cuffs scrape my skin as the full weight of my body pulls down toward the floor, my hands stretching out above my head as far as they’ll go.
I try to silence my pain as the unforgiving metal digs into my skin. Danny’s behind me, his breathing heavier and more shallow than before. I know he’s getting off on this, his cock is hard as a fucking rock. It was the tradeoff. He’d take the pain of my past away in exchange for this.
The words are on my lips. I need to tell him, to let him know that I’m not okay and I can’t give in like I used to. I don’t want this anymore. But what about everything he’s done for you? that annoying voice at the back of my head chimes in. You wouldn’t be here if not for him. And he knows what you need. You’re only in this position because you won’t listen.
“Listen to me,” Danny says softly, almost in a comforting voice as he cradles my chin in his hand. As if he knew exactly what I was thinking just now. “Give in to the pain, and it will set you free.”
A feeling