He turned away for a moment, scrubbing his hands down his face. Then he mumbled, “Gun, can we have a minute?”
Gunner frowned, but then nodded sharply. He bent down to kiss my forehead before turning and swiftly exiting the room. A long, uncomfortable silence stretched between me and Reaper, and I knew his temper was close to snapping. Not even Freyja could soothe the tension in the room.
“Do you still want to be with him?” The question came out of him so quietly, I nearly missed it.
“I’m not sure,” I admitted. “I…I don’t know about that, but I do want to keep helping him after…we have some time to move on from this.”
“Move on from this?” Reaper repeated, incredulous.
“Sorry, I’m still tired and shaken up. I might not use the best words to fit the situation, okay?”
“Situation?” he went on. “For fuck’s sake, Mari. Why do you keep downplaying this?”
“Because he didn’t mean to do it!” I cried out, exasperated. “Yes, I was scared. Yes, it was awful, and my feelings are all confused but I’m sure of that, Reaper. And you know it, too. If he had only taken a pill—”
“Do I have to tell you what I saw?” Reaper’s voice cracked. “Because I’ll paint that picture. I broke the door to find him on top of you, his hands around your neck, your face covered in blood—”
“I know. I was there,” I cut in, sounding more snippy than I intended. “I felt everything. I couldn’t breathe and thought for sure I was going to die. I know how bad it was.”
My husband’s face crumpled with despair. “Then how can you excuse any of it?”
“I’m not,” I sighed. “Something does need to happen. I’m not spending the night with him again until—”
“You are never seeing him again,” Reaper snarled. “He is not worthy to be yours and never will be.”
“That’s my decision, Reaper.”
“God damn, fuck everything.” He lowered his head into his hands, fingers tearing through his hair. “I was really hoping you’d come to your senses after you got some rest.”
“I have,” I insisted. “I’m feeling a lot more certain about this now than yesterday.”
“Mari, please…”
His voice softened to a whisper, a plea of desperation tugging at my heart. He dragged a chair next to my bed and sat down, tears filling his eyes as he took my hand. “Please try to understand where I’m coming from. I love you—”
“I love you too,” I said.
“No, listen.” He drew in a shaky breath, fingertip rubbing over the stone on my ring. “You are my wife. My whole world.” One hand stretched out to caress my waist and lower abdomen. “I want to put my babies inside you and watch them grow.” He huffed out a humorless laugh. “If I break a hip in forty years, I want it to be because I was chasing your fine ass. If he—” Reaper’s breath stuttered as his grip tightened on my hand. “If he had taken all of that away from me…I don’t know what I’d do, Mari. I’d have nothing. Do you understand?”
I turned toward him, sliding my hands up to his shoulders, caressing his neck and scalp. His arms came around my waist to hold me, his face in my chest.
“I love you so much,” I whispered, brushing kisses across his forehead. “You’re my husband in body and spirit, the father of my future children.” My whole body felt heavy, like a pile of bricks, as I brought my lips to his ear. “But if you kill him—” My breath halted, stuck in my chest for a moment before I pushed through. “I’m sorry my love, but if you do this, I can’t ever forgive you.”
Twenty-Six
SHADOW
My head pounded like the worst fucking hangover. Which was odd, considering I made sure to keep my drinking under control at the party. I rubbed my temples with a groan, confused to find sticky, flaky blood stuck to my skin.
“What…” My eyes fluttered open with the quick realization that I was not in my bedroom. I was in a jail cell, the bars reminiscent of the cage I grew up in. And Mari was nowhere to be found.
“What the fuck?” I demanded of the barren, cold room as I scrambled to my feet. “What happened?”
No one was around to answer me. I inspected my hands and arms, cold dread seeping in at the state of myself. Dried blood and scratches covered my hands and forearms. Bruises and splinters were embedded in my skin. A