chest and mine. “Reaper would never let anyone get in his way.”
Jandro stroked my back without saying any more, his breaths growing deeper and steadier. “He left something for you.”
I lifted my head. “Shadow did?”
He nodded, reaching into his cut pocket and producing a folded piece of paper which read Mariposa in blocky handwriting. “I didn’t read it. Promise.”
I took the letter with both hands, unable to do anything but stare at my name on the front. So clearly, I could picture Shadow’s hand moving across it as he wrote, the same way his hands moved over me as he tattooed me, pleased me.
“Do you want me to leave?” Jandro asked.
“No.” I reached for his hand, walking us both toward the bed. “Stay with me?”
“Siempre,” he whispered. Always.
We sank down on the mattress together, his touch drifting over my arms and waist. Always near, always supportive, even when I felt almost too afraid to open a letter. I took a few steadying breaths while he just held me, lips resting on the back of my head. Then with shaking hands, I unfolded the letter and began to read.
* * *
Mariposa,
I will never ask you to forgive me. I don’t deserve it.
I’m sorry beyond what words can express for hurting you. You’re one of the bravest, strongest people I’ve ever met, so I know you will recover, especially with the love of your men surrounding you. But I will carry this for the rest of my days. It’s the least I can do after what I put you through.
You’re always thinking of others before yourself, so please be assured that I will never allow this to happen again to another person. I’m not sure where I’ll end up, but I’m making that promise to you now. No one will get hurt because of me.
Thank you for everything you’ve shown me. I’ll always be grateful for your kindness and care, for taking a chance on me when no one else did. I hope what I did doesn’t dampen your willingness to help others. There are people who need you, Mariposa. People more worthy of your kindness than me.
If I can make one request—heal from the pain I’ve caused you. Heal completely, like I was never in your life to begin with. Forget about me. Let me become nothing more than a faded scar from your past. I don’t deserve the space in your mind. Live a long, happy life with your men who will always do right by you. I will never forget you, but please forget me.
Don’t miss me. Don’t be sad for me. It’s better this way.
* * *
Shadow
* * *
My eyes started blurring with tears before I finished reading the first paragraph. By the time I reached the end, I was sobbing again.
Jandro wrapped tightly around me, pressing kisses into my hair and stroking me as he gently pulled me down on the bed. Finally, the exhaustion overtook me.
My face was hot. My head pounded. I’d been crying so hard, my eyes felt practically swollen shut as I started to rouse.
The heat on my face came from the late-morning sun streaming through the window. A bright, sunny day, as if the nightmarish last few days hadn’t happened at all.
I stretched my sore, aching body, cracking my swollen eyes open to find toast and eggs on a plate on the nightstand, a mug of tea still steaming. Looking behind me, the sheets were rumpled on the bed but Jandro was missing. I allowed myself a smile, a small touch of warmth to soothe the deep ache in my chest as I scooted over to the food he left.
The eggs and toast were still warm, and I finished off the plate with the realization that I skipped dinner last night.
Fuck, last night.
A wave of regret hit me, clamping around the food in my stomach. I stretched out the fingers of my left hand, looking at the tan line left behind where my ring used to be.
I said awful things to Reaper, the man I promised to love forever. My hand closed into a fist, dropping down onto my thigh. I meant what I said in the moment, although my explosive anger had now given way to exhaustion and a deep, painful ache. He hurt me, so I wanted to hurt him back.
Guilt now consumed the regret, my sore eyes threatening to spill more tears if I wallowed in it. I’d never wanted to hurt someone I loved but he…
No. This is