work more. You don’t get any crap if you’re the best, you know? Even if you like guys. But … I guess that’s not really a problem anymore.”
“Wait, why?”
“Well, um. I wasn’t good enough.”
“But you’ve won so much! I saw all your trophies.”
“Yeah, but that’s minor leagues. I tried to play at nationals and got spanked. It was bad, dude. You have no idea.”
Tears fill his eyes, but he blinks them away.
“Oh man, I’m sorry. That really sucks.”
He runs a hand though his hair. “You know, nobody has ever said that before? Normally people just get mad that I messed up. Like if I’d just been better, I would’ve won. They didn’t know I gave it everything I had, and even though I did, I wasn’t good enough. People seem to have a hard time wrapping their head around that. Sometimes, people just aren’t good enough. I lost a few friends over it, actually. They only liked me because they thought I was going to be a big deal.”
“They sound like assholes.”
“I mean, I don’t disagree.”
He clearly is pretty torn up about it.
“And for the record, I don’t care if you win or lose,” I say. “If you become a big deal, I’ll be happy for you. But you don’t need to for me to be friends with you.”
“Thanks, Matt. That means a lot; you have no idea.”
Now I feel like I know Jason a little better. What I felt on the rooftop feels so distant. I can trust him. He’s just a guy, and we have a lot in common. It makes sense that he’d want to be friends with me.
He doesn’t have an ulterior motive. That’s just my stupid paranoid brain talking.
Still, I can keep my wits about me. We can get close without me talking about my family. I already feel like I know so much about him, and I hope he feels the same way about me.
So what if I don’t know his last name?
It’s just a word, right?
CHAPTER ELEVEN
We end up playing Smash Bros. for about an hour. Again, it takes me a while to get over the nerves, but now I feel like I’ve settled into a comfortable groove with him. I just feel like we mesh really well. I can be myself around him, and he seems to like it.
I haven’t mentioned my sexuality again, but I know that he knows.
This is so new. And so freaking awesome.
After Jason wins yet again, he turns to me.
“Hey, do you wanna go for a swim?”
It’s pretty hot out. Even in the AC, my shirt is stuck to my back.
Plus, if we go swimming, I’d get to see him shirtless.
There’s one small problem, though.
“Yeah, but I didn’t bring any trunks,” I say. “Sorry, I didn’t think.”
“Dude, I’ve already seen you in your underwear, it’s fine. Or you could borrow some of mine, if you want?”
“I…”
He pushes my leg. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to. We can keep playing.”
“No, I want to. Is it weird to borrow your clothes, though?”
“If it was weird, I wouldn’t have offered.”
“Okay then, sure. As long as you’re cool with it.”
“I’m more than cool,” he says, then grins, so I know he’s about to say something stupid. “I’m ice-cold.”
“Ugh.”
Still smiling, he stands and walks over to his dresser. He rifles through it, then pulls out a pair of trunks.
“Here,” he says, and he quickly tosses them at me. I catch them with one hand. They’re bright blue and have neon-pink watermelon slices on them. They’re also pretty short, and feel silky and expensive.
I raise an eyebrow.
“I know,” he says, smiling. He saunters over to me. Damn, he’s so tall. And just … so big. His chest is broad, and his biceps look especially great right now. “They were a present. But they don’t fit. I’ve never even worn them.”
He’s standing really close, and I can smell his cologne now.
“They’re not exactly my style,” I say.
He smirks. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone you wore color.”
“You better not.”
He beams. “You can get changed in the bathroom; it’s down the hall.”
I leave his room and enter the hall. He closes his door behind me, presumably to get changed into his trunks.
The bathroom is just as well designed as the rest of the house. The decor is stone gray, and I really like it. I step out of my jeans, then switch into the trunks. Once I’m done, I pull my shirt off and check myself out in the cabinet mirror above