the time the song ends, I feel so much better—like a weight was lifted from my chest. My energy level might be a little more lacking, but that's the price you pay for fun sometimes. The room goes quiet aside from the sounds of mine and Brady's labored breathing, yet we both have wide grins on our faces.
“I just have one question.”
I hum in response.
“What do you two plan on doing? Like, in September, when you go to New York for Juilliard.”
“Honestly, I hadn't thought about it,” I murmur, frowning at the concept.
The realization that I hadn't even cared to consider our future slaps me in the face. It's not that I don't like Kellan—I do, or I wouldn’t be with him—but I just don't think he's the guy I'm going to end up spending the rest of my life with. Especially not when he can't support one of the most important things in my life, all because he wants me to come to a party. However, the thought of not having him puts an uncomfortable feeling in my chest.
Brady shrugs. “Well, no rush. You still have a few months before you leave.”
I'M SITTING ON MY bed, texting Colby about why it wouldn't be wise for him to hire a female publicist, since he has a tendency to screw anything with a hole, when my phone rings, and a picture of Kellan and me graces my screen. It's one from prom. The two of us had been playing cat and mouse for weeks until he finally caved and we became exclusive.
It's crazy how we went from being that happy to arguing over something as simple as a party. I take a deep breath and hit answer before bringing the phone to my ear.
“Hello?”
“Hey,” he sighs, sounding relieved that I answered.
“Hey.”
It goes quiet for a minute, as if the two of us are just enjoying the sound of the other breathing. The corners of my mouth raise involuntarily, and I roll my eyes.
“Are you busy today?” he questions.
I glance at the clock. One in the afternoon. “Not until dinner. My dad said he has something to tell me.”
“Can I come pick you up for a bit? I miss you.”
My heart aches at the sound of his words, and I know I miss him, too. “Yeah. Are you coming now?”
I can hear as he jumps up. “I'll be there in ten.”
Before I can ask for a little more time, he hangs up and leaves me to rush around my room. Knowing Kellan, he probably doesn't have anything fancy planned, so instead of getting dressed in something cute, I keep my T-shirt and sweat shorts on. I run a brush through my hair and add just a little bit of eyeliner.
True to his word, Kellan pulls into my driveway no more than ten minutes later in his black BMW. I run down the stairs, waving goodbye to Melani on my way, and head out the door.
The second I climb into the car, I can feel the tension in the air. Kellan looks so laid-back in his white sweatpants and matching T-shirt, and if we weren't in some sort of argument limbo, I'd kiss him something fierce right now. Instead of greeting me properly, however, he puts the car into drive and pulls away.
It's not a long drive back to his house, but this one feels uncomfortable. A part of me starts to wonder if he's going to break up with me, but I've known him for years. He's not above breaking up with someone over the phone to avoid confrontation. If that was his plan, he wouldn't have picked me up to do it.
He parks the car and shuts it off. I climb out and follow Kellan to the front door, noticing there are no other cars in the driveway. The second we step inside, the level of silence tells me we're alone.
“No one is home?” I ask.
He shakes his head and locks the door behind me. “My parents are at some charity thing. They won't be home until late.”
“Oh.”
I'd be lying if I said I'm not nervous. As much as I may joke around that I'll be a virgin forever, it's not like I haven't had the opportunity to lose it. Kellan has tried, more than once, but it's never felt right. The closest we've come is prom night, when he got us a hotel room and sprinkled the bed with rose petals because he saw it in a movie. I had