not from our hearts)
that had sung it, but what was the movie) What was the name of the goddam mo-
Jake reached the top of the slope and the edge of the clearing.
He looked through an interlacing of broad green leaves and brilliant purple flowers (a tiny green worm was journeying into the heart of one), and as he looked, the name of the movie came to him and his skin broke out in gooseflesh from the nape of his neck all the way down to his feet. A moment later the first dinosaur came out of the jungle (the mighty jungle), and walked into the clearing.
FIVE
Once upon a time long ago...
(far and wee)
when he was just a little lad;
(there's some for you and some for me)
once upon a time when mother went to Montreal with her art club and father went to Vegas for the annual unveiling of the fall shows;
(blackberryjam and blackberry tea)
once upon a time when 'Bama was four-
SIX
"Bama's what the only good one
(Mrs. Shaw Mrs. Greta Shaw)
calls him. She cuts the crusts off his sandwiches, she puts his nursie-school drawings on the fridge with magnets that look like little plastic fruits, she calls him 'Bama and that's a special name to him
(to them)
because his father taught him one drunk Saturday afternoon to chant "Go wide, go wide, roll you Tide, we don't run and we don't hide, we're the 'Bama Crimson Tide!" and so she calls him
"Bama, it's a secret name and how they know what it means and no one else does is like having a house you can go into, a safe house in the scary woods where outside the shadows all look like monsters and ogres and tigers.
("Tyger, tyger, burning bright," his mother sings to him, for this is her idea of a lullabye, along with "I heard a fly buzz... when I died," which gives 'Bama Chambers a terrible case of the creeps, although he never tells her; he lies in bed sometimes at night and sometimes during afternoon naptime thinking! will hear a fly and it will be my deathfly, my heart will stop and my tongue will fall down my throat like a stone down a well and these are the memories he denies)
It is good to have a secret name and ivhen he finds out mother is going to Montreal for the sake of art and father is going to Vegas to help present the Network's new shows at the Up-fronts he begs his mother to ask Mrs. Greta Shaw to stay with him and finally his mother gives in.
Little Jakie knoivs Mrs. Shaw is not mother and on more than one occasion Mrs. Greta Shaw herself has told him she is not mother
("I hope you know I'm not your mother, 'Bama, "she says, giving him a plate and on the plate is a peanut butter, bacon, and banana sandwich with the crusts cut off as only Greta Shaw knoivs how to cut them off, "because that is not in my job description"
(And Jakie-only he's 'Bama here, he's 'Bama between them-doesn't know exactly how to tell her he knows that, knows that, knows that, but he 'II make do with her until the real thing comes along or until he grows old enough to get over his fear of the Deathfly)
And Jakie says Don't worry, I'm okay, but he is still glad Mrs.
Shaw agrees to stay instead of the latest au pair who wears short skirts and is ahoays playing with her hair and her lipstick and doesn't care jackshit about him and doesn't know that in his secret heart he is
"Bama, and boy that little Daisy Mae
(which is what his father calls all the au pairs)
is stupid stupid stupid. Mrs. Shaw isn't stupid. Mrs. Shaw gives him a snack she sometimes calls Afternoon Tea or even High Tea, and no matter what it is-cottage cheese and fruit, a sandwich with the crusts cut off, custard and cake, leftover canapes from a cocktail party the night before-she sings the same little song when she lays it out: "A little snack that's far and wee, there's some for you and some for me, blackberry jam and blackberry tea."
There is a TV is his room, and every day while his folks are gone he takes his after-school snack in there and ivatches watches watches and he hears her radio in the kitchen, always the oldies, always WCBS, and sometimes he hears her, hears Mrs. Greta Shaw singing along with the Four Seasons