in my seat in the last row, hoping he’d stay put and keep distance between us. He leaned back on his desk with his arms crossed. “For fifteen years I’ve stood up here with one goal; to teach. I’ve never used my authority to get to know a student. I’ve never put my career in danger because I couldn’t get a student out of my mind. Not until now.” He paused for a moment. “It’s nice to see you, Cammie. I’d tell you how stunning you look in that green top, but I think we’re past flattery.”
“I can’t be here with you. Sorry.” I refused to encourage him. “I won’t be able to help you out later on tonight. I’ve decided I don’t have the time, or the nerve. I’m just going to take the grade for the exam and do my best to recover.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. I was hoping, at the least, we could become friends. I know you mentioned a certain kind of Chinese food you couldn’t get around here. I managed to find it and figured I could get some for when you assist me later.”
“You think you can bribe me with food?” If he thought he could, he was mistaken. “I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but I’m not interested. I seem to have mentioned it before.” All of a sudden I watched him begin to walk toward me. I stood up, hoping I could gather my things and make it out the door before we were face to face.
I was wrong.
“Is it because you don’t want to, or you’re afraid what will happen if you do?”
I responded honestly. “Both.”
“Interesting. I suppose I’m having the same struggles. I know it’s wrong, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. You’re the dessert I’m not allowed to eat. You tempt me with those delightful green eyes making it seem like it wouldn’t be so bad to get lost in something new. The truth is, I haven’t felt like I was wanted for a long time. Just say the words and I’ll be everything you need right now.” Everything out of his mouth beckoned me to want him. He was calm and collected. There wasn’t a desperate bone in his muscular body. He knew exactly what to say to get under my skin and I was falling victim to his charm.
“I’m scared of you,” I admitted. “Of what you could potentially do to me.” My heart was fluttering, beating so hard it felt like he could hear it. Being this close to him caused me to let my guard down. I wanted to shut my eyes and fall, because he was as close to comfort as I was going to get. He was dangerous, off limits, and everything I swore I’d never be involved with. Yet there I stood, staring into those blue eyes and wondering what his lips would feel like if they were pressed against mine. “You’re never going to get into my pants,” I managed to mumble as he got even closer. At any second someone could have opened his door and discovered us standing there. I had to think with my brain instead of the parts of my body begging to be touched. “I should go.”
He gripped my hand, holding me back from exiting the room. “Meet me tonight in my office. If you don’t show I won’t bother you about it again. If you do, well let’s just say you won’t be disappointed.” He turned and winked before putting his back to me and walking away.
I rushed out of there the fastest I was able, all the while hoping I’d be strong enough to resist the urge to see what it would be like to get lost in him, or more importantly, him getting lost in me.
Chapter 5
Have you ever stepped out of a piping hot shower, wiped away the steamed up mirror to reveal a person you could barely recognize staring back at you? That's what it was like to look at myself and know what I was contemplating.
I wanted to pretend I wasn’t in control when I went back to my dorm. It would have been easier to assume I was acting on impulse instead of admitting I knew exactly what I was doing, and what it implied I was about to be involved in.
As a small child I was taught to live by the ten commandments. Committing adultery was a sin, and in doing so would