lead me to a path of evil.
I refused to think of James that way. With guilt forcing my hand, I dressed and prepared to let him down once and for all. I knew when he saw me he'd assume differently, but I didn’t want to be a coward. I'd look him in the eyes and tell him why we could never pursue our feelings. Our mutual attraction would eventually diminish, and hopefully it would give us the strength we didn’t know we could have; the ability to choose the right path before we were victims of our own desires.
I was confident up until I reached his office, catching the tail end of a heated argument between him and a woman I recognized from pictures as being his wife.
She was screaming at the top of her lungs something about secrets and how her reputation would be damaged. He pleaded with her to drop it, finally agreeing to give her space to calm down. I ducked into another hallway when I saw her walking in my direction. Coming from a well off family myself, I could spot designer shoes as they clanked past me. Unlike James, his wife looked her age. She carried herself like she was powerful, and when she was finally gone I sighed out of relief. She scared me. I would've hated for her to be my parent, even with the strict two I had.
I found James leaning over his desk as if he were upset. The creak of the door caught his attention, causing him to look up. "If this is a bad time I can come back."
He waved me inside. "No." His smile was from cheek to cheek. "You don’t know how good it is to see you." James stood and headed over to the closet, pulling out a full bottle of bourbon. "Some days require the hard stuff."
I didn’t know everything there was to discover about this man, but I did understand when someone was struggling. He clearly has issues in his marriage, and the fact that he hadn’t used that excuse to be with me gave him credit where it was due. Most perverted men would do whatever it took to get into a woman’s pants, however James had simply been himself, married and content with his life, or so it seemed.
I’d never seen them together, and now I wondered how the two of them could be so different, yet remain together for two decades. She was particular, to a point where it was annoying. Trust me, I came from money, but never had any of my family members flaunt what we had. We were equal to every middle and lower class, because in God’s eyes we were the same. We all bled. We would all eventually die.
“Are you okay?” I asked in a subtle tone. “Do you want to keep talking about it?”
“It’s better if I don’t involve you. My wife has a vivid imagination. She sees what she wants.”
“So years ago nothing happened?” I wanted to know. My attraction to this man wasn’t only on the outside. I needed to dig deeper; to explain to my own conscious why I couldn’t resist his advances much longer.
“Does the past matter? I’ve been good to that woman and she’s never seen me as anything besides her puppet.”
“Why haven’t you divorced?”
“Did you not hear me mention her father is the dean? I’d lose my job. My kids would abandon me. I stay to keep the peace.”
“So you’re not involved like a couple should be?”
He shook his head. “No. Not for a very long time.”
“You wear the ring for appearance purposes?” I had to keep digging to justify what might happen if I let my guard down for a second.
“Exactly.”
He stepped closer, putting his hands on my arms. “Let me kiss you.”
“What?” A natural instinct was to back away. I attempted, but ended up hitting the wall with nowhere else to go. “No.”
“I want to feel something again.”
His cologne was an aphrodisiac. James leaned forward, ignoring my words. His gruffly face rubbed against mine, his lips avoiding what was inevitable. “Just one kiss.”
I closed my eyes for a mere second, falling victim to temptation. Then, like a switch turning on, I shoved him away and wiped off the tickle that still remained.
“Someone could walk in at any moment. You’re not thinking clearly.”
He rushed to the door, locking it and closing the blinds. “Forgive my carelessness. I lose myself when you’re around.”
“Stop saying things like that.”
“Why? Does it