moments we have from now until Sunday. Because after I tell him, I’ll need to be okay with whatever happens.
Having the baby is my choice. I can’t force it on him.
10
Girl code
Lori
“So she’s at your place right now and you’re calling me?” Bev asks, keeping her tone low in that way one does when the other person on the phone is being quiet.
“He’s calling us,” Brady points out on the three-way call I have forced on them both.
“She’s sleeping,” I whisper. “She just showed up randomly and she’s coming to the wedding. She said we have to talk about her staying after the weekend.”
“Have you talked at all?” Bev asks the question I have no clear answer to.
“Not so much. We—uhhh—hung out—and then she fell asleep. She’s snoring. What does this mean?” I ask as I pace on the veranda.
“Maybe she had a couple of drinks. I always snore after a few whiskies.”
“You snore without the whiskies and you know what I mean. This isn’t a joke.” I roll my eyes. “This girl is messing with my head.”
“That’s what girls do, bro. They mess with our heads.” Brady’s advice makes me wonder why I called him at all. “Keep us on our toes.”
“You’re both idiots,” Bev says with a laugh. “I think her showing up means she realized she was being a giant asshole. In her defense though, you’re basically asking her to choose you over success and financial independence. That’s not an easy choice for a girl like her. It isn’t as if you all have been dating for years and she lost her job. You’ve been dating weeks and she quit it to protect you.”
“Right.” I nod along.
“Look, man, I’m not gonna lie. Nat wouldn’t want to quit her job for me. Especially not the first couple of months we were dating.” Brady starts being helpful. “So you should still prepare yourself that she might move. And you could be apart for a while until you convince her to move back and be with you—”
“She can’t go. That’s why I’m calling you two,” I say too loudly and lower my voice again. “I need a plan to make her stay. What if this is it? Like let’s just say soul mates exist, or some shit like that, and what if she’s mine? I can’t let her walk away over a job.” I sound crazy, even to myself.
“Lori, jobs are a big deal to people who don’t have one,” Bev adds. “And Brady might be right, letting her go to Vancouver without a big fight could be what she needs to see she wants to come back and be with you.”
“No! I can’t risk that.” I’m being way too loud but I can’t get my anxiety in check. “Brady, you know what this is like. You were the same as me before Nat. Guys like us don’t date or sleep over. We never tell girls they have our hearts, and I did. This girl owns my soul and there’s no getting it back and she has all the control. And I’m sitting here like an idiot.”
“Stop panicking. Control in love is such an illusion. Being in love means giving up on control.” Bev laughs into the phone. “God, y'all act like falling in love is the same as getting diagnosed with a disease. Y’all are looking for a cure the moment you have one symptom. I’ve never seen anything like it.”
“Love is scary to guys, Bev. So mocking Lori won’t help. I got you, bro. When me and Nat started dating and she was moving to the city, I was dying. I figured for sure we’d never make it.”
“Thanks, Brady. Bev, I don’t want to screw it up. But this is my first time.” I wince and wait for Brady to hit me with the jokes but he doesn’t.
“Does it feel like life or death and that it might change your world if you aren’t with this girl?” he asks, possibly tormenting me, but not caring, the answer leaves my lips.
“Yes. When she told me she was leaving, I couldn’t breathe. I went home and I was numb. And all I could think was fine, I’ll go to Vancouver too.” I don’t mention Nat calling and distracting me with her own insane news. “I need a plan to get her a job here or convince her to stay without smothering her or overdoing it.” I run my hands through my hair. “Because I feel like I’m already going in