it’s like being hit by lightning but that’s not true. Standing there, holding Zach’s photographs, the realization of how strongly I felt about him felt more like a memory, familiar and safe. The feeling made sense. I liked Zach. I liked him so much I wanted to burst out laughing at how slow I’d been. Zach, the kindest, most thoughtful, emotionally astute and supportive person had been by my side for months while I’d been obsessing about Rory and that stupid, stupid list. I felt like one of those people who turned their house over to find their keys, only to realize they were in their pocket the whole time. This was just a slightly more romantic version.
‘What are those?’ said Ruby, standing on the doorstep behind me.
‘Photos,’ I said, handing them to her.
She leafed through them. ‘Flo, these are insanely beautiful. Look at you! Look at your expression in this one.’ She held out the picture of me staring through the shop window. ‘And this one in the hat!’
I laughed. ‘Rubes, I look deranged.’
She shook her head. ‘He’s got you completely. Goofy and self-conscious at the same time.’
‘Oh, thanks very much.’
‘They’re from Zach, right?’
‘Yeah,’ I said, staring back down at the card.
‘What’s he say?’
I read the card aloud and she raised her eyebrows.
‘What?’
‘I don’t know what you’re still doing standing here in that negligee, that’s what. If Zach had sent me these before flying to the moon, I’d rent a rocket and go after him.’
‘Rubes, be serious. I can’t go after him. I’ve got a job. And Harry. It’s not practical.’
‘PRACTICAL! Flo, our sister just walked out of a very expensive wedding which may or may not cause our mother to have some sort of stroke, and you’re banging on about the relatively minor practicalities of booking a flight to Panama.’
‘Patagonia.’
‘Whatever. The point is the guy’s in love with you.’
‘Do you think?’ Suddenly, having realized how I felt, the answer to this felt crucial.
‘Oh please! He spent that whole evening he took my headshots talking about you and how much you did for the shop. I can’t tell you how unerotic it is to try and seduce a man while all he does is talk about your sister. Florence Fairfax, seriously, for once in your life can you do something spontaneous?’
‘What’s going on?’ said Mia, reappearing at the top of the stairs.
‘There’s been a lot of shouting today, even for this family.’
‘Zach is in love with Florence, that’s what, and she’s refusing to go after him.’
‘Zach from the shop?’
‘Yes, exactly, Zach from the shop. He’s delivered these photos and he’s obviously mad about her, but she won’t do anything about it.’
‘Why not?’ Mia said, frowning down at me. ‘Please, Flo, we might as well have one happy ending today.’
‘Except there’s not much I can do. He’s on his flight to South America. I’ll just have to text him.’ It seemed a feeble response but I had no other option.
‘Oh, a text. Be still my beating heart,’ said Ruby, sarcastically. ‘Well, your loss. He’ll probably pick up an absolute babe in South America.’
‘There’s nothing I can do,’ I repeated over my shoulder, trudging upstairs with the bags. ‘Here, this is yours.’ I handed Mia hers and continued upstairs to my room.
Lying on my bed, I texted Eugene first to say there’d been a change of plan and I could go round to pick up Harry that afternoon. Then I spent about half an hour trying to strike the right tone in a message to Zach so he’d have something from me when he landed.
Welcome down! Thanks for my photos, you pervert. And thank you for, well, everything really. Email me? I’ll send you pictures of Harry. Big wedding drama here but I’ll tell you another time. Safe travels xxx
I clicked send and flopped back on my bed. Then I heard Dad and Patricia arrive from the hotel and her shrieks penetrate the floor. I wasn’t sure how long I could hide up here.
My phone vibrated on my stomach. It would be Eugene. At least I had collecting Harry as an excuse to escape.
But it wasn’t Eugene. It was Zach.
I fly tonight! Just on my way to Heathrow. And you’re welcome. Drama? Hope everyone OK. X
I thought you flew at 7am? I typed.
7pm!
Ruby’s cry echoed in my head: ‘Do something spontaneous.’
I ran back downstairs where everyone was sitting in the TV room glaring at one another.
‘Ah, Florence, there you are,’ said Patricia. ‘I gather you’ve ended your relationship with Rory too?