over here with me.”
His brow furrowed momentarily, his blue eyes meeting mine with a look of confusion. And for a second, I thought he might turn away—pretend he hadn’t heard Zara or seen me. But then a tentative smile formed on his lips and he started walking toward us.
Oh crap.
Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap!
My fingers went tingly, and I looked up at Cole with what I was sure resembled a look of pure desperation and whispered, “Don’t let me go back to him.”
Because if that look in Chad’s eyes told me anything, it told me that history was about to repeat itself and Chad had come here intending to win me back.
Just like he’d done a dozen times before.
And succeeded.
Cole squeezed me closer to his side, seeming to understand just how much I’d need him to get through this. “I’ll make sure this time is different.”
And so as Chad walked toward us through the crowd of people, I reminded myself of all the reasons why I never wanted anything to do with him again.
I would not fall for his charm and manipulation tactics.
I wouldn’t let him trick me into thinking things would be different this time.
He’d cheated on me and I wouldn’t be his doormat again, or the trophy on his arm.
Each time we’d broken up, he’d always come back so repentant—always so much sweeter than he’d been before.
He’d tell me exactly what I wanted to hear. Say he was lost without me, that he’d do better by me and that things would be different because he’d had a chance to realize how lucky he was to have me.
He’d basically turn back into the guy I’d fallen in love with and promise me everything I’d ever wanted.
And I’d take him back and things would be good for a while. He’d act like our time apart had truly changed him.
But after a few months, or sometimes even longer, the old cracks in his façade would shine through and I’d be right back to where I’d been before: wishing I was with someone who treated me better.
Wishing I was with someone who treated me the way Cole did.
I’d told myself so many times that this time would be different. That this time he’d really be changed and would love me the way I now knew I deserved to be loved.
But I could only lie to myself for so long before the toxic quality of our relationship became too hard to ignore and we’d go on another break only to repeat the cycle again.
And again.
And again.
I was tired of living on this roller coaster with him. Tired of the highs and lows and feeling like I was the only one putting in the effort to make our relationship work.
But most of all: I didn’t want him anymore.
The past twenty-four hours had helped me realize that being with Chad was like living in partly cloudy weather for so long that you forgot what it felt like to have the sun fully touch your skin.
But being with Cole?
I had a feeling that being with Cole would be like living on the beach in Hawaii where the weather was always perfect and you couldn’t even remember what it felt like to be cold.
And I wanted more of my Hawaii.
I wanted more of the paradise I felt when I was with him.
So as Chad stepped in front of us, I slipped my hand into Cole’s, pulled my shoulders back, and stood up straighter.
I would not be weak this time.
I was finally going to stick up for myself and not accept anything less than I deserved.
Zara held her arms out to give Chad a welcoming hug when he reached us. “I’m so glad you could make it.”
“I wouldn’t miss it.” He gave her a brief hug then he stepped back. “Sorry I’m a little late. I got stuck in traffic.”
“Oh, it’s fine,” she said. “I was just catching up with Arianna and Cole.” And when she turned back to us, her eyes immediately went to Cole’s and my intertwined hands.
Her eyes then lifted to meet mine, a look of confusion filling her expression. And then she turned back to Chad and said, “I’m guessing there’s a reason you two came separately?”
“That’s correct.” Chad glanced at Cole and me for the first time since reaching us, and after seeming to take in how close we stood to one another, he narrowed his gaze and said, “We aren’t together anymore.” And then looking back to Zara, he said, “But