see it come to his eyes.
"I'm so sorry," I say. "I know it's not at all enough. I should've told you before, weeks ago. Just... I didn't know how, and I wanted to protect her." A tentative smile. "My daughter. Madison."
He's looking away now, past me, disappointment etching all his features. "Madison."
The Ferris wheel has started carrying us down. There's a sick churning in my gut, but it's not from that. The night air seems cooler. The stars have receded out of reach. The only thing I can smell is smoke from somewhere.
How could I ever have thought that this was a good idea? Telling him, him and me in the first place.
"What else aren't you telling me?" he asks quietly.
"What? That's it. I think that's enough." My nervous giggle falls flat.
We're at the bottom now, getting off, leaving by the exit gate.
Landon stops a few steps away. "There's someone else. Isn't there?"
"Yeah, my daughter."
The gaze he cuts me with is merciless. "Not what I meant, and you know it."
"What are you saying?"
Is that it - or is it something else?"
"What are you talking about?"
He's shaking his head, mouth twisted and ugly. "Us coming here in separate cars and having to sneak around... you constantly going to check your phone. There's someone else, isn't there? Someone else who's Madison's father."
I try to touch his shoulder. "Landon - "
He shrugs me off, stalking off a few paces to stop, back tensed. "None of this adds up. If it was really just that you had a daughter, you would've just told me. There has to be something else - someone else."
I gape at him for a few seconds, shocked, before I realize that I waited too long.
"No, no, there isn't, of course there isn't," I protest, "You're not even listening to me - "
"No, I'm using my fucking brain. Something I haven't been doing lately, apparently."
Landon stops, takes a miserable look at me. "You've been using me, Kyra. Killing us in court. Distracting me. Now you want to throw this daughter bomb to end things? Be my guest."
He starts walking, heading for the parking lot. I hurry after him. "That's not what I've been trying to do - "
"Then what has this been to you?" he says, without so much as a glance back. "Wait, I'll answer for you. Clearly, nothing. Clearly, you never saw this going anywhere."
He keeps on heading for the parking lot. I follow after him without a word.
My head's buzzing with all the different things I could say, should say.
Landon, of course there's no one else, I just - Landon, you have to believe me, I never intended to - Landon, please -
But he won't go, leaving things like this between us. He wouldn't dare.
And screw him for believing that, thinking the worst of me. Doesn't he know me better than that? Does he really think I'm capable of doing something like that?
But we get to his car, and I still haven't said a word.
"Don't worry," he says, opening his car door. "I don't see this going anywhere anymore either."
He won't leave it just like that -
He gets in the car and closes the door.
He's not going to just drive off like this -
He starts up the car.
I know Landon, he wouldn't just leave things like -
He drives away.
How is this happening?
I stand there long enough for it to get weird, if anyone else was around. But it's just me.
Funny. With all the worst-case scenarios I played out in my head, I never thought of this one.
Chapter 15
Landon
Adrenaline is thrumming through my veins. God, a kid. A goddamn kid. Whose?
Is he still in the picture? What else has she been keeping from me?
How can I believe a goddamn word she tells me now?
"Fuck!" I yell, smacking my palm against the steering wheel.
What the fuck? How could I be so fucking stupid? How the fuck could I let this happen?
And the court case...
This was all a sick game to her. I heard it myself that first day: "I hate you." Why would I think that could change so fucking easily?
Back at home, I sit in my living room in the dark, scroll and scroll and scroll through my phone's contact list. Mostly female names disconnected from any face or feeling. Like reading through the phone book - Taryn, Nancy, Jessica, Celine, Natalie.
I put away my phone.
Why even bother?
I don't owe Kyra any fucking thing. I ought to text one of them - text all of them, one of those