before me. Forlorn, depressed, all that and more, and I wanted the one thing I shouldn’t.
I wanted to make him feel better.
“Morana…” The way he whispered my name, as if he was hesitant to say it, as if he knew even my name could never belong to him—but that was where he was wrong, for how could I ignore the pang in my chest when I gazed up at him?
As rude as he could be, as awful as his magic could be… I still wanted the man attached to it all. I wanted him, and I wanted Ishan.
I shushed him, standing on my tiptoes to reach him. Before I could say anything else, before Abner could gather his wits and push me away, I pressed my lips on his, my fingers tightening their hold in his hair.
An immediate chill swept over me, but it didn’t feel bad. It wasn’t painful. When his lips were on mine—startled as they were—they felt soft, perfect, as if I was born to kiss that mouth. I had a similar feeling when I’d kissed Ishan, minus the cold, of course, but right now the god of Summer was not on my mind.
Abner was.
He clearly did not know how to take the affection, at first. Abner simply stood there, dumb, his mouth soft but not a participant in the kiss. Not really. You could press your lips upon a stone statue and call it a kiss, I suppose, but to me, a kiss was when both parties gave in, showing their desire through actions rather than words.
And this kiss that I initiated? It said so much more than my words ever could. This was not about forgiveness or any of that; I was not someone who could ever forgive Abner for his sins. This was about two people coming together as one, and it just so happened that one of those people was the god of Winter.
I was slow in pulling my mouth off his, my breath coming out in a white puff, my face a bit chilled from being so close to him, but I did not pull my entire body away, did not drop my hand from his white hair. I gazed into his silvery stare, my lips parted, mere inches between our faces.
He looked like he wanted to say something, but in the end, he said nothing. Abner did, however, wrap an arm around my lower back and hold me close, his grip surprisingly firm even though his expression was questioning.
My heart pounded in my chest, and I could feel the coldness radiating from him, through his clothes and seeping into me. It was a good thing I held a bit of Summer’s warmth in my heart; I did not know how the others had dealt with the cold without it. Truly, it wasn’t a wonder they literally turned to ice.
Finally, Abner found his voice, “I cannot let you stay here.” As if he would make my decision for me, as if he was putting down his foot and telling me I would go with Ishan.
“You don’t get to make that decision,” I told him, my voice a bare whisper as I ran my thumb along his hairline. What I really wanted to do was bring that mouth down to mine again, to kiss him and have him kiss me back, but I stopped myself, knowing Abner would want to argue with me on that. “The decision is mine and mine alone.”
“But—” He sought to argue with me, and surely he would’ve, had I not done what I did next.
I dropped the hand from his head, dragging it down his chest, feeling him inhale sharply. “Nothing you say will change my mind,” I murmured, my voice faint. “Let us focus on what’s in front of us, and for me, right now, it’s you, Abner.” I knew he hated it when I said his name, hated it with all his being; for whatever reason, he’d much rather be called Winter, but I refused.
I refused, feeling something for the man, not the god.
His expression, normally one of either sorrow or disdain, softened, melting into something else. This time, Abner was the one who lowered his mouth to mine, pressed his lips against mine in an attempt to steal the breath out of my lungs. He very nearly succeeded, too—but I was ready for him. Ready and eager, meeting his passion with my own.
This… perhaps we would look back on this night as a mistake, but