determined not to go home. You’re struggling something terrible here, and I’m worried about your welfare.”
“My welfare? So that’s the reason you suggested my name for such a thing?” I asked, pulling my hand back.
“Well, yes. I’m thinking of you, what might help you. I’ve observed you. I know you take as good care of yourself as possible. You’re not a party girl, by any means. You’re far more responsible than most young girls your age, very mature, in fact. Right now, this idea seems somewhat shocking to you, but to the Davenports, it’s the most serious decision of their lives. And don’t assume anything. Even after all I’ve told them about you, they still might not choose you.
“On the other hand, if they both like you, Emma, they’ll give you seventy-five thousand dollars.”
“Seventy-five thousand?” I could feel my eyes widen.
“That’s not all. Until you gave birth, you’d live in the Davenport mansion, all your needs and then some paid for. All your debts here would be covered right into the future.”
“Future? Meaning?”
“They’d pay to keep the apartment for you so you could come back to it and continue to pursue a singing career in New York, if you like.”
“Pay the full rent for the entire time?”
“Yes.”
I sat back. “That’s a lot of money.”
“Well, he makes a lot of money, but he also comes from one of the richest families in the state.”
I sat forward like someone with a hearing problem. “And they’d pay me seventy-five thousand dollars?”
He nodded. “With that kind of money, for a while at least, you could do whatever you wanted full-time. You wouldn’t need a job. You wouldn’t be obligated to anyone.” He leaned forward. “These are financially sophisticated people. You wouldn’t be paying any income tax.”
I sat back, astounded. It was like someone heaving a pail full of gold coins at me. Seventy-five thousand dollars? I would be lucky to make twenty-five thousand all year, and I knew how hard I would work for that.
“Look, I’m very fond of Dr. Davenport and his wife, Samantha. As I said, we’ve become like family. I’m not only thinking of you. I would never suggest you to them if I didn’t know you’d be perfect for it, for their sake as much as for yours. Please don’t be angry at me for suggesting it.”
I nodded, still feeling stunned, and not because of any religious reason. Every girl thinks about what it would be like to be pregnant. Of course, it was uncomfortable, and giving birth was no walk in the park, but what sugarcoated it was you were going to have your baby, a child of your flesh and blood, conceived, you hoped, out of wondrous love. What Leo was suggesting was all mechanical. You were agreeing to sell your body, in a way, rent it. Why wouldn’t it be enough to send me packing? But seventy-five thousand dollars and all these added financial benefits kept me from getting up and running out of his apartment.
Money had been the master in my family home for as long as I could remember. Had I brought that master with me to America? Would he always be beside me? I recalled the shock in Mummy’s face when my father once said, “Money is life.” When she started to object, he rattled off everything it could do, like end starvation, bring warmth and shelter, keep church doors open, but most of all, provide opportunity to grow and become someone, something of value.
She looked at Julia and me helplessly. We were too young to offer any counterarguments to support her disagreement, and besides, it wasn’t only that our father was making another regal decree; despite what we wanted to believe, we both agreed. We were old enough to understand what he meant. The only thing I could think to say to soften it for her and myself was, It might be true, Mummy, but that doesn’t mean we have to like it.
I could tell myself the same thing now.
“There’s one more thing,” Leo said. “If you agree to go through with it, that is.”
“What?”
“You’d have to keep your participation secret.”
“How do I do that? A pregnant woman isn’t exactly someone incognito.”
“Once you show, you don’t leave the house; maybe you don’t leave the property from the moment you arrive, except for medical business. You’ll sign something promising to keep the secret of your participation, or you can be sued to return the money.”
“I don’t think it’s something I would talk about anyway,”