any serious relationship would only hinder my pursuit of any sort of singing career, not that I could claim an iota of real progress. No one had discovered me.
Except for managing to keep up an apartment, with Clara’s help, of course, I had little to show for my adventurous and determined effort to become the next Barbra Streisand. Julia’s mocking of my dreams was becoming less something to hate her for and more something to thank her for. And I loathed just the thought of my being forced to come to that conclusion.
Clara was in her robe and slippers, obviously sitting there and waiting for me.
“Hi,” I said, entering the living room.
“I couldn’t remember your schedule today. For some reason, though, I thought you were coming home earlier.”
“That was my intention, but Doug Martin, the head waiter, didn’t show up and didn’t even call to say he wasn’t coming in. Mr. Manning is going to fire him if he hasn’t already found a different job, which is what he suspects. Very deceitful. Also, Terry Longstreet called in sick with the flu. She and I share half the left side of the restaurant. Marge had to leave early because her mother wasn’t feeling well, so I agreed to stay longer and take on three more tables than my usual load. For some reason, we got busier than ever, too.”
I plopped onto the small sofa, took off my socks, and began rubbing my feet.
“I think I need thicker socks.”
“I bet you wish we had a fireplace,” Clara said, smiling. “Once, when I was in England, in Salisbury, I stayed in a quaint bed-and-breakfast that had a wonderful fireplace. It was only September, but the nights were already that cool.”
“Somehow, to me, it seems colder in New York than in England.”
“I imagine where you don’t have the ocean air, you don’t feel winter as much as we do here.”
“So how are things with you?” I asked. I was really looking forward to some hot ginger tea and curling up in bed, but I also sensed she had something important to tell me.
“Well, I think overall quite improved,” she said.
“I can sense you’re happy about something,” I said. I really didn’t. If anything, I was feeling just the opposite. “What’s new?”
She took a deep breath and said, “Today I learned that I’m getting the private secretary position.”
A big smile filled my face. “Cheers, Clara. I’m so happy for you.”
“Thank you. There’s more,” she said. She sat forward. “I haven’t been totally forthcoming, but we haven’t seen each other that much, especially to sit and have a long conversation.”
“Forthcoming? About what?”
“The past four weekends, I didn’t go to visit my family. I’ve been seeing Curtis on and off. Yesterday, he met me for lunch and gave me this,” she said, and extended her left arm to show me the engagement ring on her finger. She had kept her hand tucked against her thigh until she was ready to display her ring.
For a moment, all the air in my lungs evaporated. I could recall my father saying, “The future has a way of surprising you no matter how prepared you think you are. And remember, there are never enough parachutes to go around.”
“Oh. Well, congratulations, Clara. That’s a beautiful ring.”
“It’s a full carat petite solitaire. More than I wanted him to spend, but he’s determined to show me how committed to our relationship he is now to make up for our splitting up.”
“If it’s what you want, I’m very happy for you.”
She sat back, her smile sinking back into her face. “Maybe you won’t be. I’m moving back in with him until the wedding.”
My smile sank away, too. “I see. Well, that’s not unexpected. When, exactly?”
“I’ve paid for our new month’s rent here.”
“Yes,” I said slowly.
Was she going to ask for the money back?
“And I’ve discussed the situation with Curtis. He thinks it would be fair for me to leave the half deposit, since I’m moving out so quickly and you have to find another roommate so quickly. Although I can’t imagine your having difficulty finding someone new.”
Finding someone wasn’t the problem, I wanted to say. Finding someone suitable was the problem.
“When are you moving out?” I asked again.
“Tomorrow,” she said. “There would be no point to my putting it off, and I would be staying at Curtis’s apartment every night, anyway. He’s a little farther from the company, but these days I’m getting there earlier, and now I won’t have to.”
When I didn’t say anything,