I cut the water and wrapped a towel around my wet body. I dug through my bag for anything decent to wear. When I found my favorite t-shirt I stopped looking.
“Mason?” I called into the darkness as I emerged from the bathroom.
“I’m here,” he answered from a room to my right.
The door was cracked and a small yellow sliver of light was gracing the beige carpet in the hall. I moved forward, formulating a plan with each step.
“Hey,” I said softly, leaning against the door frame in just the t-shirt.
Mason’s eyes studied me from his spot on the bed and I could see I hadn’t shocked him at all. “You can come in.”
I felt empty. I needed someone. I needed to feel connected to someone and he was right there. If he cared, he would understand. If he wanted to help me, things would go the way I’d planned.
I frowned at him, finding myself studying the green of his eyes while I moved closer. “I need this, OK?”
His fingertips grasped the bare flesh of my thighs and pulled me down to my knees. I was eye level with him, breathing heavily. I spread my knees apart and fell forward, pressing my lips against his. He returned the kiss full force and, for the first time in so long, I felt the same desperation contained in my heart, emanating from him.
I grabbed my shirt and lifted it up over my wet hair, leaving my body on display for him to accept or not. Mason’s eyes went immediately to the scars across my left side. He raised a hand to run his finger across the largest but changed his mind.
“What happened to you?” He asked. When I didn’t answer his lips met the soft skin of my collarbone. “What happened to you Fallyn?”
I ran both hands through his hair. “I’m broken, Mason. Nothing I do fixes it.”
“You’re beautiful,” he murmured, his hands running circles around both breasts. “I can’t fix you, if that’s what you want.”
There was sorrow in his beautiful eyes and I knew he was broken too. Someone or something had broken him just like me. Maybe we were damaged on different levels but damaged nonetheless. I felt like I was looking at his true self, his hands trembling as he ran them over my exposed stomach. The calluses from playing his guitar caught against my smooth skin and it wasn’t pleasant but it wasn’t horrible. I could feel it and it was real. What it was would remain to be seen.
“You can’t fix me, no one can.”
I pressed him backward with my right hand, until he was flat against the bed. I unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it away from his body. His white shirt he wore underneath went next. I admired his pale skin. He was thin and nothing like the typical Hollywood types I’d seen Jill fucking. The thought of her made me want to sleep with him even more. She wasn’t special, clearly.
When I started to unbutton his pants, his hands circled my wrists, stopping me.
“What? What’s wrong?” I blurted out, frustrated.
“This is wrong, I can’t do this.” He looked tortured as he grabbed my shirt and pulled it back over my head. “I didn’t bring you here to have sex with you.”
I remained on the bed, on my knees. Tears had sprung up instantly with the rejection.
“Fallyn, I can’t take advantage of you. There are so many assholes who probably have and I just won’t add myself to that list.”
The rage built from the pit of my stomach up. I jumped from the bed and stormed off to the bathroom to put my everyday clothes back on. “I see, Mason. You can stick your dick in Jill no problem but you can’t give me a second look!”
“That was a mistake,” he yelled. “I admit that…”
“Whatever, I’m out of here.” Bag in hand, I jogged through the apartment and slammed the door behind me. I should have known better.
Trying to seduce Mason was high on my list of stupid things I’d done. I don’t know what came over me or why I thought he’d want someone like me. The tears wouldn’t stop and I began to run, trying to get as far away as possible.
My phone sounded off and I ignored it, knowing it would only be one person. When the ringing persisted I stopped and threw my bag down, ripping the thing out and flipping it open violently.
“What?! Can’t you just let this go?”
“Fallyn, please.