wall.
The one that got away.
Romeo didn’t want him to get away.
Romeo needed him to keep visiting. He needed Chad for himself to feel alive. He got up and started pacing around his cell. He needed Chad to feel good. The weeks with no visits had been hell, but he needed to ensure he kept him, needed to ensure Chad kept visiting. What did others do in relationships to keep the ones they loved?
They lied.
Romeo stopped in front of the mirror and looked at himself. The handsome mask that hid his ugliness. He needed to use his face, all the sorrowful, sincere expressions it could pull, and lie to Chad.
All his life he’d lied to his parents to keep them happy, and he was about to do the same with Chad.
He had to make Chad think he was disgusted about the copycat, because that’s how normal people would’ve reacted, they would’ve been afraid, horrified, disturbed.
If that’s the lie he needed to tell to keep Chad, then he would. He couldn’t be completely honest with Chad because if he was, he’d lose him.
****
The door to the visiting room opened, and Chad at least gave him a small smile. He was having trouble keeping eye contact again, and Romeo suspected guilt was the reason. He felt guilty over not visiting, Romeo was about to lie to his face and didn’t feel guilt at all.
“I thought you were gonna stop.”
Chad didn’t look at him. “I thought about it.”
“Chad…”
He looked up, finally connecting with Romeo. His eyes were still tired, the bags beneath were deeper. Romeo knew he’d look worse the longer the case went on, like Chad was slowly turning into a corpse.
He snorted.
Everyone was slowly turning into a corpse, that’s all living really was.
“I couldn’t stop.”
Romeo nodded.
“Maybe I do take after my mother. I’m addicted to something that’s bad for me, and even though I know it is, you’d have to pry it from my cold dead hands to stop me from having it.”
“I’m glad to hear it. Well, not so much the cold dead hands part…”
Chad laughed, enough that it reached his eyes. He looked at Romeo, then his smile started to fade.
“What happened last time,” Romeo started, “my…reaction—”
“I’ve been thinking about Toby.”
Romeo frowned. “Toby?”
“Yeah.”
“Your dog.” Romeo said slowly.
Chad nodded. “I cared about him, and he cared about me. We had a good bond, an understanding, but we were still alien to each other.”
“You were different species.”
“Sometimes I did things he wouldn’t have understood,” Chad paused, then laughed. “And sometimes he did things I didn’t understand, but the bond was there, it crossed species.”
Romeo nodded for Chad to continue.
“And I was thinking, that even though I saw a side to Toby I liked. He might have had another one, a side I’d consider bad if I didn’t understand it.”
“How do you mean?”
“Well, to a rat he was a monster. He killed them, he enjoyed killing them, especially when he thought it made me happy, too. To me, it was only a rat, vermin. But he had that killer instinct, and if he killed something bigger, or if he joined in with other dogs while they killed something, or got excited watching, and felt like he wanted to join in, felt like he was missing out. It would’ve upset me.”
“I could see why it would.”
“But that wouldn’t have been Toby’s fault, it would’ve been mine for not understanding. He comes from wolves, they have instincts, desires, thought processes I couldn’t possibly understand. It would’ve been wrong for me to judge him by my own standards. We’re different species, but that doesn’t take away from our bond, it makes it stronger because we like each other enough to see past it.”
“You and Toby.”
Chad snorted. “Yeah, me and Toby.”
Romeo didn’t have to lie. He didn’t have to use his handsome mask, and fake disgust, or fear over the copycat.
Chad got it.
He didn’t like it, but he accepted it.
That made Chad pretty fucking amazing.
Romeo let out a long, slow breath. “You’re something else, you know that.”
“Yeah, I’m messed up.”
“You make messed up look perfect.”
“A compliment from a serial killer.”
“A bloody hot one.”
Chad laughed.
Romeo bit his lip, then whispered. “I missed you visiting.”
“Yeah?”
He nodded. “Yeah, those few weeks were hell.”
“I’m sorry, I needed to get my head together.”
“And it’s together?”
“Yeah, as much as it can be. I won’t miss a visit again.”
“Good, you’re all that gets me through the week.”
“And you’re all that gets me through mine.”
Romeo smiled so hard his cheeks ached. The uncharted territory of