than a red-headed shell, a monster masquerading as a man.
And I’ve fallen victim to the very nightmares I tried to set loose upon him.
“Because of me,” I finally say, too tired to carry this burden for another twenty years. “My brother killed himself because I used my mental magick to drive him insane.”
Thirty-Six
STEVIE
My heart shatters for him, the pain in his eyes so vast and endless, I fear I might lose him forever.
I push myself up on my hands and knees again, dragging myself to his side, determined to touch him no matter how hard Ani tries to retaliate.
This time, however, he actually lets me pass, standing up from Doc’s chest and giving me a clear path. There’s no kindness or compassion in the gesture, though. His smug, twisted grin is all the proof I need; the Ani I know and love is no longer with us. Not here. Not now.
I take Doc’s face between my hands, careful not to move his head, ignoring the monster looming over us like a shadow.
“I’m… sorry…” Doc pants, his breath crackling and wet.
Tamping down my fear, I smile, focusing on the stormy gray of his eyes.
“I love you, Cassius Devane,” I whisper. “Do you understand? I claimed you, remember? I love you, and I’m not letting you go.”
Doc offers a weak smile in return, blood oozing out from between his lips, pooling with the dark wetness rapidly spreading beneath his head. “You… you gave me everything, my Star. And for a little while, I let myself be happy.”
“Shh, don’t talk.” I press a powder-soft kiss to his cheek, sending him every last ounce of healing energy I’ve got left, willing his body to weave itself back together.
“I never deserved you,” he whispers, reaching for my face. His bloody hand tangles in my hair, and a little more light dims from his eyes.
“Stay with me.” My smile falls, my pulse thudding in my ears. “Stay.”
“Your light is too bright,” he says, his own smile fading in response. “Too… too pure.”
“No. No, no, no. Doc! Cassius!”
He doesn’t respond. His eyes turn glassy, his chest going still.
Goddess, no…
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” Ani shoves me out of the way, then touches his Wand to Doc’s chest. His shirt burns away, and on the tender flesh of his chest, the mark of Judgment flares bright.
XX.
“Hate to cause mass chaos and run,” Ani says, “but Dr. Devane and I are a little late for our next appointment. Catch you at the next family dinner, kids! Try not to die before then.”
“Ani, wait! We can—”
My words fade away as Ani swings the Wand in a wide arc, and a blinding white flash explodes in the room, sending me sprawling on my back.
It’s a long time before I can move again—so long I start to wonder if I’m paralyzed. If I’m dead. If Ani spelled me into some sort of eternal consciousness, trapped inside a broken body cursed to rot while I watch from inside, unable to move, unable to scream.
But then my hands and feet begin to tingle, the blood slowly working its way through my system again. When the spots of light finally fade from my vision and the heat of the explosion recedes, when the dust settles, when the house turns so silent I fear we’ve all fallen into the abyss, I finally manage to sit up and take stock.
Baz and Kirin are slumped against the wall on the other side of the room, slowly coming back to consciousness.
The other witches are still locked outside the bedroom door, still trying to force their way in, just like Jareth at the window.
But Doc and Ani are gone, no trace of either of them but the gleaming black pool of blood seeping across the hardwood.
Fear threatens to send me over the edge, but I take a deep breath, willing myself to stay calm, remember one of Doc’s first mental magicks lessons:
Fear itself isn’t real. Danger may be real, but fear is just an emotional response to that perceived danger…
But fear is still one of our most primal emotions. It can blind us.
And—if we can quiet our thoughts long enough to allow for grace, for hope—that same fear can unite us.
Doc always said conquering fear begins with presence and awareness. But love is part of that too, more powerful than any other emotion, than any other weapon the Dark Arcana can wield.
Doc’s voice isn’t the only one in my head now, giving me hope and grace. I hear Kirin too, keeping