for about a week. It’s wearing heavy on me but it’s the only way I can shut my mind off at the end of the night. I’ve slept with three other girls since Amy. I’m an asshole, a whore, whatever; It’s something I’ve always done but afterwards I always feel like shit. It’s wrong, I know it is, but I just want the connection with someone. That someone happens to be the first girl who approaches but all I see is Layla’s face. No matter how many times I try just to push her to the back of my mind I can’t do it.
“Wake your ass up, Eli!’
I drop my feet to the floor as the pins and needles take over my legs. They’re sore as hell from being elevated all night up on my desk. I stretch, my whole body sore from sleeping in my office chair. It used to be comfortable, now not so much.
“Eli!” Jaylinn yells again.
Groaning, I stand, walk over to the door, unlock it and pull it open. “What?” I grumble.
She waltzes in shoving a cup of coffee in my hand and a bag in the other. The smell coming from the bag has my stomach turning over. “Good God,” she sniffs. “You need a shower, a long hot one with lots of soap.” Turning, she assesses me. “And more sleep. You look like shit.”
I flip open the lid of the steaming coffee. “You’re annoying.”
“Aww,” Jaylinn slides into a chair. “Are we having a sibling spat?”
I cock an eyebrow at her. “I’d shoot myself if I were your brother.”
“You’re cute when you’re cranky.”
“I’m not cranky.”
She rolls her eyes. “No, you’re hung over.”
I take a seat back in my chair still sipping on the coffee and pushing whatever the hell is in that bag away from me. I feel like throwing up.
“So,” she rubs her hands together. “You need to fill me in on what the hell happened with Layla and I’m not leaving here until you do. I’m tired of you not answering me.”
“I’m—”
“You are.” She states matter of fact with a knowing smile on her face. “I’m not leaving here until you spill it.” Jaylinn leans back in the chair. “I’m tired of being ignored by you and her.” The smile slides off her face and her eyes tear up. “I’m all alone and I hate that. You won’t talk to me, one of my best friends has gone off the radar, and my boyfriend is God knows where in the United States playing with balls and bats.”
I set the coffee down, lean back in my seat and rest my eyes. I’m not up for talking; it’s the last thing I want to do. I understand that she’s starting to worry about what happened but it’s not my business to tell her. I wasn’t even supposed to know myself.
Jaylinn huffs. “You’re really not going to tell me?”
I open my eyes and fix them on her. I know she’s safe to confide in but I don’t know if I should. It makes my stomach twist thinking about the bruises on the side of her face and neck. I picture her sister, so young, listening to Brian and Layla fight. I wonder if she saw him hit her. God, I hope not.
“Eli,” I shake those thoughts from my head. “If you grind your teeth any harder you’re going to break them.”
I grab the coffee, turn in my chair, and stare out the window. It’s a rainy April day, everyone is hiding out in their houses, the beach is empty and the life guard stands are turned over. The only movement is the passing cars and the crashing waves.
“Okay,” Jaylinn starts. “We’re going to play a game. I’m going to guess and you can say, hot, cold, yes, or no.”
I don’t respond but she goes on anyway.
“Is Layla really sick?”
Again, I don’t respond.
“Christ, you’re not making this any fun. Okay, rule change. If you don’t talk I’ll take that as a no, if you make noises or answer I’ll take that as a yes.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Finally, we’re getting somewhere.”
She’s quiet for a second and I hope she’s grown tired of this game and wants to give up already. The pounding in my head would be thankful for it.
“So, Layla isn’t sick.”
I grunt.
Jaylinn claps. “Now, you’re getting it. Okay, so Layla isn’t sick. Is she dead?”
Silence.
“Okay so she’s living and isn’t sick. Great. Okay. Did you have a fight?”
I groan.
“Was Brian involved?”
I growl.
“Well, okay then. So you’re fighting with Layla