I drop Layla off.” Brian tells his friends as they climb into their car.
We pull out of the parking lot towards the highway. I kick off my shoes trying to get comfortable even if it’s just for a few minutes. My feet are killing me.
Brian reaches forward and turns the radio down. “I wanna take you to dinner. When is your next day off?”
I briefly close my eyes thinking of my schedule. “Sunday.”
“Sunday it is then. I’ll actually be coming home from the city so you think you could meet me at Graziano’s?” His job has been taking him to New York a lot lately on business meetings.
I want to tell him no but I won’t. I’ve got just enough money saved up for all of the bills this month but it’ll leave me flat broke and if I need help I might have to fall back on him. “Yeah, sure.” Do I think it’s weird that he’ll be working on a Saturday, yeah I do. Is it fucked up that he wants to take me to dinner but can’t even pick me up, yeah, I do. I’ll walk though because I’m not wasting money on a cab or the bus.
Brian reaches over and rests his hand on my thigh. I cringe because I try my damndest not to have any kind of sexual relationship with him if I don’t absolutely have to. I do the bare minimum to keep him happy and not take his wrath out on me. I lean my head back against the headrest and close my eyes hoping this is as far as he’ll take this.
Twenty minutes later we are pulling up to my place. Looking up above Jax’s it’s dark and my bed is calling my name. I slip my feet back in my shoes forgoing tying them. I turn to Brian, “Thanks. I’ll talk to you later.”
He reaches up and cups the side of my face. He leans in and kisses me gently on the lips and then again and once more before he slides his tongue into my mouth. He tastes like the Jack he was drinking. I hate Jack. The kiss is unappealing, no emotion, no feeling behind it. I feel nothing for him, nothing at all.
I pull back before it can get out of hand leaving him panting. “I miss you.”
I choke the words out, “I miss you, too,” because I don’t miss him worth a shit. I hate him. You’re doing this for Fallon, Layla. It’s all for Fallon.
I open the door and climb out needing to get the hell away from him. He pulls away before I even step away from the curb. I shake my head making my way upstairs to throw myself on my bed and pass out.
One day I’ll be able to tell him to go to hell, that I don’t need him anymore. That I can stand on my own two feet. A couple more months until summer is here, and then I should be able to handle all of this on my own.
Just a couple more months.
I spent the morning and afternoon in my pajamas with Fallon watching movies, eating pancakes, ice cream, and relaxing. Mom has been in her room all day only coming out to use the bathroom. I hate her almost as much as I hate Brian. Actually, I hate her more. If she was any kind of mother we wouldn’t be in this situation at all.
I glance over towards the clock, it’s four, and I have to meet Brian at six.
“Alright, squirt. I’ve gotta get ready to go out.” I say pushing the covers off of me. I carry our cups over to the sink and toss them in.
“Where are you going?” She whines. “I want to go.”
I frown because I can’t take her. “I’m going out with Brian. He’s taking me to dinner. I won’t be long.” I hope I won’t anyway.
“Okay.” She pouts.
She’s breaking my heart. We haven’t been spending much time together lately because I’ve been working as much as possible. I wish she was old enough to understand. “Squirt?”
She looks up with tears in her eyes. “Want to help me with my makeup and hair?”
Her little face lights up. “Yes!”
Fallon jumps from the couch and follows me into our room. I have my black dress that I’m wearing on the bed with my heels on the floor. “I’m going to jump in the shower real quick then we can get started.”
Lying back on her bed