to the stairwell.
Mia appears at the door in front of me. “Arrow? Are you okay?”
I open my mouth then close it again. “Your fucking ego couldn’t handle knowing that you’re her second choice.”
He’s right. Fuck him. But he’s right. I don’t want to be the guy she’s with because the one she wanted screwed up one too many times.
I swallow hard. “I have to help out at the high school for a few hours, but after . . .”
Her forehead furrows as she studies me, waiting for me to spit it out.
“Do you have plans for tonight?” I’m so lame. So fucking lame I want to stab myself in the eye with the nearest sharp object. And I can tell just by looking at her that she has plans.
She looks gorgeous. She always looks gorgeous, but tonight she looks like an angel. She’s dressed in white, a little dress that shows more leg than it covers, with a tiny sweater on top that covers her shoulders and her freckles. She’s wearing makeup and her hair is down around her shoulders. My stomach knots. She’s definitely going out tonight, and of course she has plans. Brogan would make sure they had plans for New Year’s Eve.
“Okay, so you obviously already have plans.” I lick my lips, not sure how to go about this.
“I do.”
Since the day I met Mia, she’s had my heart in her hands, and every day that I deny that, it just hurts me more. “Cancel them. Whatever you were going to do with Brogan tonight, don’t do it. Be with me instead.”
Her brow wrinkles with concern. “What’s wrong, Arrow? You look upset.”
I drag my fingers through my hair and tug on it. You deserve so much better than this. “Mia, I’m in love with you.”
Mia
My heart. Oh God, my heart. “Don’t say that.”
“What do you want, Mia?” He lifts his arms, palms up. Anguish pulls at his mouth, contorting his attempted smile into a frown. “Do you not see it? Have you really been oblivious all this time to how much you mean to me? How special you are to me?”
“You’re important to me, too.” The understatement is a betrayal to how I really feel. I fell for Arrow that first day. He smoothed that shiny purple leaf in his fingers and offered it to me as a gift, and I was never the same. “Arrow, I want us to be friends.”
He drags a hand through his hair and spins away, as if he can’t handle the sight of my face anymore. “I don’t.”
The night goes quiet. Maybe the frogs and owls are as shocked by his words as I am. “What?”
When he turns back to me, grief twists his features. “I’ve tried, Mia. For over a year now, I’ve tried to be your friend and nothing more. But I don’t want to be your friend. That’s not what you are to me. It’s not enough.”
“Don’t do this,” I whisper. “Don’t look at me like I’m something to you.”
“I’m sick of ignoring this ache in my chest when I see him with you. I’m sick of pretending I don’t need to be more than that guy you fucked up with once. You’re not something to me. You’re everything.”
“Don’t.” My voice cracks to match my heart. “You don’t understand. We can’t be together.”
“Why not?”
“Because our parents—”
“I don’t care if your dad hates me. We’ll work it out. I’ll win him over. Can’t we just—”
“We can’t.”
“Then look me in the eye and tell me you don’t have feelings for me. Tell me our night together didn’t mean something to you.”
I hold his gaze and open my mouth, but I can’t force the lie out.
“Why?” he whispers. “What is it that’s keeping you away from me? I’ll leave you alone. I won’t bring it up again. I just want to know why.”
I want to lie to him, but the only way past this is with the truth. “Because my mother had an affair with your father. She left when my dad found out and started making threats.”
His face goes blank—whitening. I did that—I pulled the drain on all his hope. “What? When?”
I swallow hard. “Nic says it went on for at least a year before she left town.” His lips move slowly as he mentally positions the timeline, and I can’t stand here at the edge of this cliff and wait for the end of anything he and I could be, so I help. I push. “It would have been