said, my jaw tightening as a wave of fresh bitterness coursed through me. "They'll pull starters late in the game if there's a lead. Have to preserve them, just to put in a guy who shouldn't be on the field to begin with."
"I don't get it," Elliot said, shaking his head. "Is it a scholarship thing? Do they have to play so many games or they're dropped?"
"Sometimes, but usually that's only negotiated for high-profile players. It's more a money thing. They want him out there playing because he's an asset. He makes big plays that put butts in seats."
"Yeah, well, he won't be able to make any plays if he'd laid out for months with re-injury."
"Yeeep." My fingers curled tightly around the edge of the seat. "Trust me, I know."
Elliot looked over at me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him lift his hand as if to touch me, then hesitate. "Sorry, I'm sure me going on about this isn't helping anything."
"It's fine. Just good to know even somebody who isn't 'in the trenches' can understand."
We were pretty early and that section of the stadium filled in around us. When the band started up to introduce the team, I felt the hairs on my arm stand on end, goosebumps prickling across my flesh. No matter how many times I saw this, it always had the same effect. The guys loved running out of the tunnel. It was a highlight for them every Saturday, and I loved seeing them doing something they were committed to more than anything else.
A lot of the guys I'd worked with before were in this starting bunch and I explained their cases to Elliot, having to strain my voice to be heard over the speakers. By about the fifth kid, he laughed.
"What?"
The soft smile he gave me made my heart do a stupid little flip.
"I feel the same way about my own kids. I feel like decades from now I'll still remember my favorites," he said almost wistfully.
I guess our jobs were similar in that way. We were both looking out for young adults who were trying to navigate the heartless world around them. People who were often pushed aside by society, told who and what they could be at a young age. People who were defying those labels against all odds, but who still had an uphill battle.
It brought me some comfort and made me feel a sense of kinship with the man beside me. He got it. He'd understand why I cringed and felt every hard hit. Why I would pace the stands if a player was slow to rise. Why I hated hearing any of the coaches berating them endlessly.
It was a nice feeling. Every other boyfriend I'd had told me I was just being oversensitive, and--
He's not your boyfriend, dumbass. Stop thinking of him like he is.
That snapped me out of the soft, fuzzy place I'd somehow gotten myself into. The voice I heard moments after, meanwhile, ripped any shred of comfort away with a merciless yank.
"Reuben Adelstein?" There was a pause, but I'd already gone stiff. I knew exactly who it was. "Holy shit, it is you!"
The man standing way too close for comfort was tall and skinny, his tight clothes helping to sell the illusion that he was some kind of model. His hair was styled into the stupidest fucking pompadour I'd ever seen, two-tone with the top a honey blond and the rest black. He wore big, spacer earrings in his ears and studs in his eyebrows, with a little eyeliner around his eyes for good measure. I knew from experience that his nipples were pierced, too, and he went crazy with the manscaping.
"Kayden," I said, trying to keep my voice at least civil. "Good to see you again."
It wasn't. Not even a little bit. I could feel the hurt and anger bubbling up in me, trying to escape from the place I'd locked it away so many years ago.
He was pressed up against a well-built, hairy guy -- his usual type -- who had his hand firmly on one of Kayden's ass cheeks.
"Oh my God, it's so good to see you!"
The performative flamboyance made me sick to my stomach. Men who were naturally high-energy and just like that in general were great. No problem at all with that, or how anyone wanted to express their queerness. But that wasn't what Kayden was doing. He was playing up the role that got him the most dick.