if I express it, it’ll just annoy him.
“So, did you find it? Your peace of mind?” I ask after a few minutes.
“No. But it’s been good to cut off the world and just… be.”
I look around the rustic but chicly decorated cottage. It’s got every modern convenience, but it’s furnished to be comfortable rather than stylish. Two huge brown leather couches make a corner around a fireplace that stands in the middle of the room.
“So, this was their house?”
“Yeah. They bought it and the farm when they walked away from their families in Houston. Gigi pays the taxes on it every year. Has it renovated regularly. She said she’d planned on telling me one day. And that almost dying made her realize it was time.”
He pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket and smooths his fingers over the worn edges of it. He’s got the nicest hands. Long, broad fingers, square, wide fingernails, and intricately veined. Strong, sure hands that seemed to know things about my body that no one else does.
“This is the letter. He planned on finding a way to see us again. He said my mother and my grandfather wouldn’t agree to let him see us.”
“Can I read it?” I ask and he hands it over without looking up.
I unfold it carefully, it’s worn and even though he’s folded it nicely, I can tell it’s been balled up more than once.
Dear Remi,
One day I hope you’ll understand that your freedom is worth more than anything.
I didn’t choose her.
I chose that. And I will never love anyone as much as I love you. I will find a way back to you.
Love,
Dad
“Oh, Remi, I’m so sorry.” My words feel so utterly inadequate, but they’re all I’ve got.
“Me, too. Clearly he was a piece of shit for leaving his family, but I wish I’d had the chance to get to know the real man behind all of the bullshit my mother’s taught me about him instead.”
He drops his head into his hands and groans.
“I’m so sorry, Remi.” I touch his shoulder and he stiffens and sits up straight. My hand slides off his shoulder.
“Where’s your family?” His sudden change of subject catches me completely off guard. I stare at him blankly for a minute and he laughs. “You know... Paul, Bianca?”
I glance at the hands in my lap then back at him. His smile disappears when he sees my face.
“I knew it. Something’s wrong. What happened?”
“Nothing is wrong. Paul and I got a divorce. Bianca’s staying with him while I’m here. I’m bringing her down for a visit the week after next. If I’m still here.”
My answer is met with silence.
His eyes lose their slightly faraway look and focus intently on me.
His posture changes – he straightens and sits up.
The hunger that was there before is back and this time he’s not looking away. My throat is dry, and there’s a thrumming in my core that’s vibrant and strong.
I haven’t felt that sensation in years.
And oh, how I’ve missed it. But, I need to tamp it down. I’m not here for this. There’s so much to talk about.
“Remi, we shou—”
“You’re single?” he asks, his voice a low growl.
“Uh - yes,” I say, and my breath catches in my throat at the way he’s looking at me. He looks hungry. And like he wants to fuck me. My pussy clenches, and his eyes take a quick scan of me, he shifts closer.
“Do you still burn for me the way I burn for you, baby?” he asks.
A wave of lust hits me hard at the desperate catch in his gruff voice.
I nod, fast and hard.
He lunges across the couch and without preamble, or question, cups the back of my neck with one hand, cups my ass with the other and crashes his mouth down on mine. He presses his body flush to mine and the insistent press of his erection against my thigh is the most erotic thing I’ve felt in my entire life. Delicious, toe curling tension coils deep inside of me.
“Then, let’s do this before we say another word and ruin it.” He breathes into my mouth.
He’s panting like he’s just sprinted to catch me. He nibbles at my lips with his feverishly hot mouth; he bites his way down my neck and I arch my back so that my throat presses into his teeth.
I want to feel the bite of it.
I am burning. Around me, everything else catches fire, too.
I’ve forgotten why I’m here.
I don’t remember anything