won’t get to do the one thing money can’t buy. I want to practice law. I want to make a difference that way.”
“Your mother’s going to lose her mind when you tell her.” I nearly sag with relief at the acquiescence in his tone.
“She doesn’t have a say. I have my own money and I am not asking for permission.”
“No, what you’re asking for is a shit storm.”
“Will you support me? If you do, she won’t say no.”
He looks down at the letter and then back at me. “You do something that’s a credit to our name, and I will support you. That’s always been the rule. If you are part of this family, then you’ve got to act like it. And convince your mother.”
“She’ll be fine,” I say even though I fully expect her to lose her shit when I show her the acceptance letter.
“And so will you.” He hands it over to me. “People leave. People look out for themselves. You’re making a choice now, one that is all about what you want. You’ll meet someone else.”
“I love her,” I say without hesitation.
His head jerks backward in surprise. His eyes narrow and I see a flash of anger in them.
“Don’t be stupid,” he barks, glaring down at me in the way that used to intimidate me when I was a boy. But, I’m not that boy anymore.
I meet his glare with one of my own. “Only stupid thing I’ve done is to lie to her.”
He shakes his head and rests back in his seat. He looks so tired and I instantly feel bad for putting this on him.
“These youthful, passion-filled liaisons are nothing but a pathway to pain and tragedy. That’s not how you live up to the things your family expects of you. Your story is already written, son. You have great things ahead of you.”
“I don’t know… She made me feel… feel a lightness, Pops, that I’d never felt before.”
“Legends aren’t born to live light lives.” His voice is full of reproach.
“You know my nickname?” I ask in surprise.
“Just because I don’t hang out on the basketball court doesn’t mean I don’t know what’s going on. It’s fitting. You are destined to be great, Remi. And you’ve got to accept the sacrifices that come with that. You’ve got so much of everything. In ways your father didn’t. You’ve got staying power that he didn’t.”
I start at that. “Pops, why do you say things like that? He died. That’s hardly a failure.”
My grandfather shakes his head like he’s trying to dislodge something.
“Before he died, he stopped trying. He stopped putting the family first. You forget that so much of our responsibility is your family, Remi. Men like us can’t be focused on our own desires. You will taste the kind of success that most people can’t even imagine. That isn’t free. My father came here with nothing. You think you live in this house because he followed his heart or his dick?”
“It’s not that—”
“You’re eighteen. Of course, it is.”
He stands up. “I’m happy to support law school because it’s a noble profession. But I will not support you chasing after a girl who didn’t even have the decency to say goodbye.”
The truth of that stings. I clench my jaw and look away from his steely, triumphant gaze. He sighs and reaches over to put one of his huge hands on my shoulder.
“Joni’s going to apply early decision to Georgetown. Pursue that. Someone who understands the demands, the obligations that come with a family like ours. Not everyone is cut out for it. Not everyone can do what it takes to preserve it. It takes an iron stomach and the willingness to sacrifice. You’ll see, son, one day. You’ll look back and know that her leaving was one of the best things to happen to you.”
My insides feel like they’re mangled together in my gut.
“I can’t imagine a day where that will be true.”
“You won’t have to imagine. It will come,” he says with a certainty I know he really feels.
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small velvet drawstring bag. He tugs it open and empties it into his upturned palm and holds it out to me.
In his palm is a gold signet ring with a horse on its face.
“This was your father’s. We got it back after he died When you take the helm, it will be yours. You will wear it with pride. And you will honor your family’s name.”
Part II
The In Between
6