to go now. Tonight.
Simone was dead silent, her eyes huge and filled with tears. She swallowed roughly, more than once, but couldn’t seem to get herself under control.
Reaching out, I placed my hand on hers, squeezing it. “I love you. I would never have gotten through my fucked-up mess of a life without you, but I have to leave. I have to run now and never look back.”
She didn’t argue again, just nodded a few times, tears spilling over and trailing down her cheeks. “Where…” She cleared her throat. “Where will you go?”
I would be a danger for my first few shifts. I had to find a safe place, somewhere deserted with plenty of room for me to run.
“I don’t know,” I admitted truthfully. “But anywhere is better than here.”
She buried her head in her hands, a sob escaping. “This can’t be goodbye.” Her voice was muffled until she lifted her head again. “You’ve been my best friend since we were pups. I mean… Come on, Mera. Think about what you’re giving up.”
Fuck. She was destroying me.
“What about Dannie?” she said. And now we were bringing out the big guns. “You don’t even want to say goodbye to her?”
Simone was not going to let me go without a fight, and I was already so worn down from fighting. “I’ll sleep on it, okay?” I said, trying my best to lighten my tone. “Maybe I can last another month. I mean, what’s a month in the great scheme of time?”
She swiped at her eyes, nodding a few times. “Yes. You can make it another month. I’ll keep you safe. I can do it.”
Reaching across the car, I wrapped my arms tightly around her, just breathing in the faint scents that Simone always carried with her. Lavender from the flowers in her front garden, and aniseed from the licorice she secretly loved. I’d miss that.
When we were done with the emotional sob fest, Simone got her car going again, taking me right to my front door. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” she said, examining my face. It wasn’t a question. She was telling me I better be here tomorrow or she’d beat my ass.
I nodded, forcing a smile. “You got it, babe.”
With one final look at her beautiful face, terrible braid, and kind eyes, I sent out a silent hope that one day I’d be strong enough to return here.
And she’d forgive me for what I planned on doing.
5
“Lucy, order’s up!”
It had taken me a couple of weeks, but I was finally answering to my fake name: Lucy Jones. Leaving Torma was the best decision I’d ever made; the second-best was heading for a town without any pack, deciding I was going to risk it on my own.
The freedom of waking up without fear was everything, and my only negative thoughts these days were about how many years I’d wasted in Torma when I could have been free.
Hurrying over to the counter, I grabbed the heavy tray with three burgers and about fifty tons of fries. In these parts, truck drivers all but fell into the diner, starving after being on the road for many hours. This tray of food would be gone in no time.
“Here you go,” I said with a smile, lowering the tray to dish out the three plates, with the shared fries in the center. “Need me to top up your drinks?” I asked, noticing they were halfway empty.
“Nah, all good, love,” the burliest man said, his salt-and-pepper moustache quivering as he bit into the burger. The other two were shoveling the food in, too, so I let out a chuckle.
“Alrighty. I’ll check back in a few minutes.”
I rounded out a few more tables, filled drinks, dropped orders off, and all the while, I had a genuine smile on my face. Sure, life wasn’t perfect. I missed Simone and Dannie and knew they’d be upset at my sudden disappearance. Not to mention the stress over my first shift next week—I hadn’t really figured out what to do about that yet. But I’d take these small, dark moments over the lifetime I’d been living before.
“How long have you been in Hood River?” salt-and-pepper moustache asked when I popped back to refill his soda. “I’ve been stopping here on my route for twenty-odd years, and I’ve never seen your pretty face before.”
He was a harmless flirt. I enjoyed those the best.
“Not very long. I was passing through and this place won my heart over, so I decided to stay.”
It was the