kiss me. “Do you want a tour?”
“I’d rather not risk it.” I put my foot on the accelerator and want to drive out of here as fast as this car is designed for. I leave a cloud of dirt in my wake and decide it’s a place I don’t want to frequent again. Coming here was a risk, especially to my football career. These people are not my friends.
Star and I are just fucking. Nothing more. I don’t want to owe anyone anything.
“What do you want for dinner?” she asks.
I give her a sideways glance. “You.”
Christmas is only days away. We haven’t spoken about it other than her knowing I’m going home to the farm. Star hasn’t any holiday plans.
I’m not sure what I feel, yet I will miss her. I’m not a big one for goodbyes, so rather than Star come over tonight, I cancel our plans and send her a text.
Me: I’ll see you in a couple of weeks. Merry Christmas.
She replies quickly.
Star: Thanks. Same to you.
There’s no neediness coming from Star, neither does she compete for my attention. Maybe she has her shit together and is not clingy like other chicks, yet I sense a change in her, and I can’t quite put a finger on what it is.
I’m in my room packing a suitcase when Braxton walks in.
“No Star tonight?”
“No. I’ll see her after Christmas.”
“So, you’re going to keep seeing her?”
I stop folding the T-shirt in my hands and give him a look. “I’m going to keep fucking her. I don’t know why it concerns you, especially since I’ll be out of here when I return.”
“Be careful,” he says sharply.
“I am.”
He frowns at me. “Don’t believe for a minute her dad doesn’t have her followed. You’re not fooling anyone.”
I place the T-shirt in my case and pull out another from the wardrobe. “Why would they care?”
“She’s one of them. From what I hear, Phoenix still has ideas for Star within their club. They hope she’ll forgive and forget, so Bear and her will get back together. They all have each other’s back. Remember that.”
“She can’t stand him. And how do you know this?” I ask, even though I’m connecting the dots to what she previously told me about the Silver Hell MC.
“They support our club.”
“In what capacity because we’re not talking about superfans here.”
Brax folds his arms. “I’m not privileged to all the details, only it’s like a silent sponsorship because we can’t really go sticking up signs saying ‘sponsored by Silver Hell MC’ everywhere. They want to help the club, and there’s a shitload number of membership seats at every game.”
I nod my head in understanding. Most of what he said I couldn’t give two fucks about, apart from the dipshit who knocked her around, and her dad wanting her back with him is a concern.
“I’ll talk to her after Christmas,” I say to get the monkey off my back.
It seems a lot of people don’t want Star and me together. The problem is, I’m not ready to let her go, no matter how dangerous it is for us to be together.
7
Yellow grass borders the side of the road as far as the horizon. It’s not unusual this time of year. The road to the horizon hazes, the sun beating down on bitumen. Only a fool would stand outside barefoot and risk severe burns.
I’ve lost count of the times I have driven along this road. It rarely changes in December—always dry and damn hot. I prefer the months of winter where the fields turn green and the reassurance of rainfall. I turn up the volume of my Spotify playlist blaring through the speakers of my car. My Adelaide home isn’t far from the airport, so when I arrived, I took an Uber home. Without wasting time, I did a quick check to make sure everything was in order before taking my Audi from the garage. It’s been a few months since she’s been for a spin. I miss this car. It is what it is. I can’t keep thinking of Adelaide as my home since the farm is my actual home. Yet, I belong to none. I won’t let the demons take over my thoughts, so I focus on the lyrics rather than what lies ahead.
I click forward to the next song, hoping it distracts me.
How will Rhett react to seeing me?
Will Mum be in good health?
Is the orchard thriving or more of a family burden?
Flick.
Cold Play’s “A Sky Full of Stars” plays through the