are out on a date night, and he asked if I could swing by and make sure everything was cool. That’s it.”
Channing rolled his eyes. “For fuck’s sake, I’m an adult. I can take care of myself.”
“Then why were you letting that dickhead speak to you like that?”
His stare was sharp enough to cut. “I was in the process of getting rid of Trevor. The bouncers were still within my line of sight—I wasn’t unsafe. I’d brought Trevor outside to tell him he was a dick, and I never wanted to see him again. Then you went all Conan the Barbarian on him.”
I didn’t love the sound of that, but it was fair. I’d felt like a barbarian when I’d heard the vitriol coming out of that asshole’s mouth. A red haze had settled on me and hadn’t cleared until I’d knocked the fucker flat. It had taken a monumental amount of self-control to keep from pounding him until he bled for the way he’d talked to Channing.
“I’m sorry.” I sighed. “I shouldn’t have acted like that. I’m too old to be beating my chest.”
“Oh, hell, Reagan,” Channing said. “I’m mad at myself for liking it so much. It was a ridiculous turn-on, even if it wasn’t necessary. And for the love of God, you aren’t too old for anything.”
There was no missing the layered meaning of Channing’s statement. You aren’t too old for me. Never mind that I was old enough to be his father. “So you’ve got, what, an old man fetish? You looking for a father figure?”
It was supposed to be mean, but I was losing ground so quickly, and I didn’t know how to stop from sliding straight into grabbing Channing and never letting him go. It was a desperate, stupid bid to stop the inevitable, even if my words didn’t make me much better than Trevor.
Channing saw it for exactly what it was. “You’re better than that, Reagan. I know what you’re doing, and I know this isn’t who you are. Your goodness is why I’m so attracted to you. That and the red hair. And no, I don’t have a fetish. I could say that I’m attracted to any aged man, but the fact is, I’m only attracted to you. Since the first moment I laid eyes on you, no one else has stood a chance.”
It was a blow that left me breathless and aching, everything I wanted so close, and yet still so far away. “I… I thought you said you got experience.”
Channing barked out a short laugh. “Are you asking me if I fucked around the last few years? I got college experience. I did try to date, had some mild fun a few times, but it was futile. No one was you.”
I rubbed a hand over my beard and mouth, taking this information in. He hadn’t been the only one who’d had difficulties with other men. Ever since that desperate kiss he’d given me three years before, I’d been unable to find anyone else that could hold my interest. Fuck, I was in so far over my head.
“I don’t think of you as someone who just fucks around, Channing, but if you had, that wouldn’t be any of my business, and I wouldn’t mind as long as you were safe. I just...Jesus, this is so hard for me. I’ve got history with this shit. The age difference bothers me, okay? It doesn’t matter how I feel about you because I can’t change that.”
Molly showed up with our food, putting out plates of eggs, bacon, biscuits, and hash browns. “You guys need anything else?”
I said, “We’re good,” at the same time Channing muttered, “He needs a pair of balls.”
If Molly heard, she politely didn’t say anything, but smiled and said she’d check back on us in a while.
Before I could light into Channing for his comment, he started in on me. “For fuck’s sake, Reagan. What am I supposed to do? I can’t change my age. You told me to get experience, to grow and live my life. I did. And you were right, I needed to grow up and mature—and I did. But at some point you’re going to have to trust that I know what I want, or you’re going to have to accept my resignation at Get Ink’d and not see me again, because I refuse to keep trying to earn your respect if you’re never going to be able to give it to me.”
My ears burned and my