hated to think he was alone. I was imagining all kinds of things. I did have an active imagination. It was why I was so good at my job. In this situation, that imagination was not working well for me. I pictured him alone in a dark room, sad and distraught and hating himself.
I knew the relationship between him and his father was strained. Who did he have to turn to? Who was going to be there for him? I was probably giving myself too much credit by thinking he needed me. He didn’t need me. The man had lived his entire life without me and had done just fine.
With the day coming to an end and still no word from Xander, I felt like I was going out of my mind. I needed some distance from the situation. I needed guidance. I drove to the bar, knowing Nelle would know what to do. She would talk me through the craziness I was feeling.
“Hi,” she said with a soft smile when I slid onto my barstool.
“Hi,” I said on a long sigh.
“Do you want a drink?”
I shook my head. “Just a diet coke please. I don’t trust myself to day drink.”
“What’s going on?” she asked as she handed me my drink.
“He’s gone.”
She froze, her hand pausing mid-wipe on the bar. “The last time you used that phrase, you were telling me someone died. Please don’t tell me that’s what you’re saying now.”
“No, not that kind of gone,” I told her. “Xander is gone. He didn’t show up for a very, very important meeting this morning. Something is wrong. He would never miss that meeting. He’s been working day and night to prepare for the presentation. Something isn’t right.”
“His brother died,” she answered. “He needs time. I would think that would be a given.”
“He didn’t cancel the meeting. People flew in from all over to be there and he stood them up. That isn’t normal. He would never do that.”
She didn’t look worried. “I’m sure he has a lot on his mind. It isn’t really all that surprising that he would forget something like that.”
I wasn’t buying it. “Not Xander. He isn’t like that. He’s been consumed with this project. He wouldn’t just forget it.”
“Maybe he blew it off on purpose.”
“Why would he do that?”
She shrugged. “People do crazy things when they’re grieving. They can be irrational. Have you left him a voicemail? Texted him?”
I gave her a dry look. “Gee, why didn’t I think of that?”
“Don’t get snarky,” she said with a laugh. “I was only making sure.”
“I’ve been calling him since yesterday and have not gotten an answer, which isn’t surprising considering his phone is at the bottom of his pool.”
“It’s at the bottom of his pool?”
“Yes.”
“Then why did you call him?”
“I didn’t know it was in the pool when I called,” I explained.
“I’m so confused.”
I looked away. “I kind of broke into his house.”
Her brows shot up. “You did what?”
“I was worried,” I defended.
“You broke into his house? Since when did you become a felon?”
I shrugged a shoulder. “His gate was locked. I figured he was holed up inside. I really wanted to see him. I wanted to make sure he was okay.”
“How did you get in if the gate was locked?”
“I used the beach stairs and found a kitchen window unlocked.”
“Wow. Breaking and entering. You are really taking things seriously.”
I rubbed my fingers against my temples. “I’m so worried about him. He was not in a good way when I left on Saturday. He was distraught but not distraught, if you know what I mean. Like he was very robotic. He shut down and pushed me away. He wants nothing to do with me.”
“He’s hurting,” she answered.
“I know but I can help.”
“Evie, you know men are not like women. They don’t want to talk about their feelings. They don’t want to hash it out or cry it out.”
It was not what I wanted to hear. “But he’s hurting. It’s his brother. His little brother. He loved his brother. In his eyes, he lost his only family. It would be like me losing my dad. I cannot even imagine what that would be like. I just want to wrap my arms around him and hold him close.”
“Oh, sweetie, I know you do. He’ll come around.”
“I don’t even know where he is!”
“Evie, I’m sure he went home to be with his father,” she said, sounding so perfectly reasonable.
“But they don’t get along,” I said.
“I think in this situation, they