wanted. The bubbles felt like little drops of acid in my stomach.
“Thank you for coming,” I heard my father’s voice behind me.
Showtime. I got up. “Hi, Dad.” I greeted him with a smile before hugging him. “I wouldn’t miss this.”
“You look lovely tonight. I’m so glad you are here.”
I forced another smile. “I wouldn’t miss it.”
He studied me with his eyes that always saw too much. “What’s wrong?”
I tried to play it off. “Nothing. I’m fine.”
“Evie, I know when you’ve been crying,” he said, gently pushing me back into my chair before sitting in the one next to mine.
“Allergies,” I lied.
“Evie, you don’t have allergies.”
I sighed and stared down at the napkin on the table. “You were right, Dad. I should have listened to you.”
“I’m usually right about most things. You’ll need to be more specific.”
It was supposed to be a joke. I knew he was trying to make me feel better. I wasn’t sure it was working. “Xander.”
It was his turn to let out a long sigh. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t want to be right. I didn’t want you to get hurt.”
I shrugged. “Well, I did, and I have no one to blame but myself. I should have listened to you. I got caught up and didn’t see who he was.”
“What happened?” he asked in a gentle voice.
I could feel the tears burning the backs of my eyes. I did not want to ruin my makeup. I looked up at the ceiling, swallowing several times and taking several cleansing breaths. When I managed to push the emotions away, I looked at him. “His brother died. His only brother. He was in the Marines. I’m not sure what happened, but he died, and Xander wants to be alone. He ordered me to leave him alone. I wanted to help him. I know he’s suffering, and I just wanted to help.”
My father’s face fell. “Oh my. That is awful.”
“It is awful. I met his brother when he was home on leave recently. He is—was—so full of life. I really liked him. I know Xander loved him.”
“Of course, he did,” he answered. “I don’t think I have ever told you, but I had a brother.”
I frowned. “What? You did?”
He slowly nodded. “Yes, I did. I don’t ever talk about him because to remember him is to hurt.”
“What happened?”
“I was about fifteen at the time. He was ten. We lived near a lake and used to go swimming all the time. One day, I guess he decided to go alone. I think I was hanging out with my buddies or something. He drowned. The guilt I felt was tremendous. I shut down. I couldn’t bear to be around my parents. I saw their grief and I was convinced they blamed me. I blamed myself.”
“Oh my god,” I gasped. “Dad, you never told me!”
He offered a small smile. “It didn’t seem like you needed that kind of pain. You feel so strongly. I didn’t want you to think about it.”
“But Dad, you could have told me.”
“It was in my past. There was nothing you could have done. Sometimes, a man chooses to leave those feelings in a dark place. I’m not saying it’s healthy, but it is a coping method.”
“Xander said he wanted to be alone. He said he isn’t capable of love. He’s wrong. I know you don’t like him, and you don’t believe me, but I know in my heart he felt something for me.”
“Well, of course, he does. He’d be a damn fool not to love a woman like you.”
I smiled, fighting back tears. “Thanks. I wish you could see he is a good man.”
“I don’t think I will ever sing the man’s praises, but in this situation, I feel for him. He’s in a tough spot. I might not like him, but I feel bad for him. You need to be there for him.”
That was unexpected. “He doesn’t want me around. He made that very clear.”
“Make him want you. He needs you. He doesn’t know it, but he does. He will push you away. I pushed everyone away. I didn’t want anyone to see me as weak. I refused to cry. I thought if I cried, it made me weak. It took me a very long time to come to terms with my grief. It was actually your mother who helped me to see it wasn’t my fault. Things happen. I had this idea in my head I was some kind of powerful creature capable of fighting fate.