turned to her hopelessly. “I’m sorry about him.”
“Please don’t be upset by that idiotule, Tatiana,” Andrei pleaded.
“I’m not,” she lied, wrapping her arms around herself, sorely wishing she was back in Alaska. “I’ve had a long flight. I need to rest.” That was also a lie, but she wanted to be alone with her thoughts.
“Okay.” Andrei’s chest deflated. “We’ll bring you back to our grandparents.”
“Thanks.” She fought back tears, afraid she’d pissed them off, too.
Four years ago, a year after discovering they were her fated mates, she’d spent a passionate night in their arms, allowing them to mark her before her parents took her home. She’d promised to return within the year, but after their mother was killed, she continued to put them off. She’d waited too long, and Dimitri would never forgive her. How was she supposed to bond with them now?
AFTER CONSTANTINE WALKED her to the door, she said a quick goodbye and shut it in his face. She didn’t mean to be so cold, but it was taking all her strength to hold it together. She had to go upstairs before her parents asked her questions she didn’t want to answer. The last thing she wanted was for her fathers to challenge Dimitri.
She heard laughter coming from the kitchen. The brothers’ fathers and stepmom were still visiting. Their house was only a few yards away, so she imagined they visited often. She shrugged off her coat and boots and swore when she realized she’d left her thick scarf behind. No matter. She’d get it in the morning. She gingerly tiptoed to the staircase, praying they didn’t notice her.
“How do you like your new home?” Eilea called as she reached the bottom step.
She paused, back stiff, and refused to turn around. “It’s beautiful.”
“Tatiana, what’s wrong?” her mother asked.
She slowly turned around. “I’m fine, Mom.”
Boris stood. “What did our sons do?”
“Nothing. I’m just tired. If you’ll excuse me.” Without waiting for them to respond, she ran upstairs and went straight to the guestroom.
Great Ancients! She’d failed miserably at concealing her emotions. She sure as heck hoped her parents stayed out of it. If they got involved, they’d only increase the tension between her and Dimitri.
Falling onto the twin bed, she buried her face in a pillow and screamed. She hated her life so much right now. She hated Dimitri for ruining everything today. Most of all, she hated herself for the careless actions that had gotten Katarina killed and for failing to make things right between them.
Sitting up, she hugged the pillow to her chest and wiped away tears of frustration. Footsteps approached her door, and she swore under her breath. She didn’t want company, and she certainly didn’t want to explain what happened today.
She stiffened at a knock on the door.
“Tatiana, may I come in?” Eilea asked.
She wiped her eyes again. “Okay.”
Eilea set a tray down on the antique white dresser beside the bed. “I noticed Dimitri wasn’t with his brothers when they dropped you off.” There was pity in her eyes. “Did he do something to upset you?”
Tatiana’s instinct to protect her potential mate roared to life. “It’s not him, it’s me,” she blurted, hoping she sounded convincing.
Sitting beside her on the bed, Eilea took her hand. “I know how temperamental second alphas can be.”
Tatiana had a hard time thinking of a rebuttal. Second alphas were always the most headstrong and the ones who held grudges the longest. “I don’t want to be here, Eilea, and it shows.”
“You don’t feel drawn to your mates?”
“Every hour of every day.” Guilt threatened to consume her. “They’re all I’ve thought about for five years.”
Eilea arched a brow. “But?”
Tatiana’s chest deflated like a popped balloon. “I’m not worthy of them.”
Resting her hands on her distended belly, Eilea heaved an overly dramatic sigh that made Tatiana cringe. She sensed a lecture coming.
“How many people need to tell you her death wasn’t your fault?” Eilea asked.
“I told her nobody liked her. I punched her in the face.”
“Something she’d been needing for a long while,” she said wryly. “She made the choice to put herself in danger.”
“I know.” Tatiana groaned, as the echo of her mom’s exact words replayed in her mind. “I’ve heard all of this from my parents.”
Eilea’s brow furrowed. “What can we do to help you move past this?”
“I don’t know. I thought I needed time, but my guilt has only grown stronger.”
“Oh, you poor dear girl.” Eilea cupped her cheek. “I don’t like to speak ill of the dead, but