“If he’s unredeemable, doesn’t that mean I am? I don’t want to be a man who brings you pain. I want to be someone who you can look at and be happy to see and not feel conflicted by.” He pulled away and looked into my eyes. “Doing all of this for Cherri, it’s about doing right by her, but it’s also about doing right by you. I want to be a good man that you deserve.” My heart started to beat even faster as I was overwhelmed by that sentiment. Was he doing all of that to try and earn my second-hand forgiveness? “If you thought I was like that, like your dad, you wouldn’t want to be with me, right?”
“Yes,” I said, “but you’re not like him. I don’t know how it all works, but you aren’t like my dad. Don’t do it for me. You’re different. I don’t know why, but you are.”
Nathan pulled me toward him and pressed his lips against mine again. I was powerless to resist him. After the time we’d spent apart after the fight, I didn’t want to spend any more time apart from him. I didn’t understand anything. Was there some invisible line that all rapists fall on? I’d always assumed that it was one size fits all, but Nathan wasn’t the same as my dad. Some people could be redeemed. I believed that. It was all so complicated, but did I have to figure it all out right now?
Did I have to question myself when Nathan’s hands felt so good sliding up my spine? His lips traveled away from mine to trail down my jaw and eventually over my throat. He nibbled a little bit there, and I fell back onto the couch, taking Nathan with me. He slid his hands up my torso, taking my shirt up with them, and he peeled it over. My hands went to his stomach, dragging his shirt up as well, and he leaned back just enough to pull it the rest of the way over and tossed it to the side.
He started to climb back over me, but I put my hands on his chest and pushed him back to sit on the couch. I dropped to my knees in front of him, my body already growing hot all over.
“You don’t have to,” Nathan said.
But my hands were already on his jeans, unbuttoning them. “I want to. I like doing it.”
Nathan rolled his eyes. “If that were true, then it would mean you’re even more than perfect.”
I shrugged. “I guess I’m just that perfect.”
Nathan didn’t complain. His hands combed into my hair and gently held the back of my head as I pulled his growing arousal from his jeans and leaned in to lick it. He let out a deep sigh, and I closed my lips over him, sliding my tongue down until I hit his base. I slid my way back up and spent some time on the tip before slipping down again. I closed my hand over Nathan’s shaft and worked it down as I pulled my mouth back up and moved into a rhythm. Each time he let out a groan, my skin prickled with excitement. My other hand moved between my legs, with the plan to service myself, but Nathan noticed and grabbed it.
I looked up at him, and his eyes were wide and dark with lust. “No, you don’t have to do it for yourself.”
He pulled me up, effectively pulling me off of him, and he kissed me before positioning me over the back of the couch, leaning over until my hands were almost on the floor. He reached his hands around me to undo the button of my jeans and pull them off of my body.
He threw them aside before leaning in and letting his tongue slick across my heated center. I let out a moan as one of Nathan’s hands wrapped around my thigh and started to rub the sensitive bundle of nerves there. Between the movements of his mouth and fingers, my mind started to go hazy. It felt like the room was getting hotter by the second, and I closed my eyes and let myself breathe in the intense feeling of pleasure that was washing over me.
“Nathan,” I whimpered, but I didn’t get any additional words out before a powerful orgasm washed over me. He continued to lick and rub me through the feeling, and once it had finally subsided, he stood up and