neighborhood.
Okay, maybe it did have a higher crime rate than the beachfront area, but it was, for the most part, a middle-class neighborhood.
“I’ll be fine,” I said as I stood and put my hand on the door.
“You always say that. Maybe that’s the problem, Layla. You’re too damn good at convincing yourself that you don’t need anyone,” he replied in a disappointed tone.
God, I hated that particular voice.
It will sound a lot worse if you tell him.
“Good night,” I told him in a jittery voice, and then quickly closed the door of the vehicle.
I knew he was waiting, so I jogged up the stairs instead of waiting for the outdoor elevator.
My actions felt so familiar, and it reminded me of every time that Owen had waited for me to turn the light on when we were teenagers.
I opened my apartment door quickly, and my hand flew to the switch before I closed and locked the door behind me.
My duty done, I slid down the door, plopped my ass on the tile, and finally allowed myself to really cry.
CHAPTER 14
LAYLA
Dark: Haven’t heard from you for a while, Dreamer. Everything okay?
I’d been sitting on my bed in my pajamas reading email when I’d noticed that Dark had sent me a message on the Not-Just-A-Hookup app.
We hadn’t talked in a while. Owen had kept me so busy that I hadn’t really had time to talk.
Then again, Dark hadn’t messaged me, either, until today.
Me: You’ve been a stranger, too. I’m okay. How about you?
Dark: I’m good. Everything work out okay with the boss?
I sighed. Maybe I never should have told him about that.
Me: Yes and no. Long story. He isn’t the jerk I thought he was. I misjudged him, and I felt pretty bad about it.
Dark: Don’t beat yourself up over it, Dreamer. I’m sure you apologized, right?
Me: I did. But it didn’t feel like enough to me.
Dark: What’s wrong? You don’t sound like your usual chipper self tonight.
Did I really want to talk to Dark about everything? No, I didn’t, but maybe I could be really general . . .
Me: Have you ever cared about somebody so much that you never want them to know about the bad things you’ve done in your life?
Dark: You’re going to have to give me more info than that, Dreamer. I could take that a million different ways. I know we don’t do specifics, but a little more insight would help.
Me: I’ve done some bad things, and made stupid mistakes. I have a friend who only sees the good things in me. Is it weird that I don’t want that person to know that I’m not as sensible or as smart as they think I am?
Dark: Weird? Probably not. But I think if I cared about somebody, I wouldn’t want them to ever think I was perfect. I think I’d want them to see all sides of me, not just the good ones, and then have them choose to like me anyway.
He was probably right, but I wasn’t talking about little annoying things.
Me: What if I fess up and this person is disgusted and appalled?
Dark: Then they weren’t worthy of your friendship anyway. Everybody has some kind of skeletons in their closet, Dreamer. Just be brave enough to tell them about yours, and let them decide if they can accept them. If they don’t, screw them. Maybe I don’t know you all that well, but I have a hard time believing your mistakes are any worse than mine. Mass murderer?
I laughed out loud.
Me: Nope.
Dark: Child abuser?
Me: Never!
Dark: Animal abuser?
Me: I’m an animal lover.
Dark: Okay. Then you’re good. Anything else is completely forgivable.
I grinned, feeling a little more upbeat than I had a few minutes ago. I knew he was jokingly trying to put things into perspective. And he did. A little.
Me: Do you have skeletons in your closet?
Dark: Believe me, Dreamer, you don’t want to know the answer to that question. I told you that we all have them.
Me: That bad?
Dark: Let’s just say that I bet your closet isn’t as full as mine.
Me: So you haven’t found anybody that can totally accept yours?
Dark: I don’t talk about it. It’s easier that way.
Really? So why had he told me to take a chance?
Me: Then you aren’t following your own advice.
Dark: I’m not saying I wouldn’t if I found somebody I actually trusted. The desire to spill my guts has just never happened.
I had to wonder what in the world Dark was doing on this dating app. I