and if not for the painful grip I have on my cockhead, I would follow her over that cliff.
But this isn’t about me. It’s about my woman, and I have to make sure she’s okay when this is over, make sure I give her any aftercare she might need. Because this is so powerful, so life-altering, and I feel honored to be the one who helped her achieve it.
She gives one final shudder before her hips collapse to the bed, and she pulls her hand up to rest on her mound, her breaths sawing in and out of her, her eyes still closed. She lies there, catching her breath, and I can’t take not touching her any longer. I let go of my cock and take hold of her right hand, pulling it up to my face. I see her eyes open just as mine close, and I inhale her scent deep into my lungs, feeling my dick strain against my pajama pants. I take her pointer finger into my mouth, tasting her wetness and wanting more, so I slip the middle and then the ring fingertips between my lips, using my tongue to lick them clean.
When I open my eyes again, her face is a mask of heated desire, and I swallow her down, leaning forward to kiss her once more. When I let go of her hand, she shifts, wrapping that arm around my shoulders, bringing her left down from my hair to grip my bicep, and then she pulls. She’s so tiny, so much smaller than I am, but I let her have her way, allowing her to pull me on top of her until my hips are cradled between her thighs.
“Please, Viking,” she whispers against my lips. “Please, I feel so empty inside. I need you to fill me up.”
I press my forehead against hers, the fucker inside me snapping its jaws, biting at the bit to do exactly as she wants. But I shake my head. “I’m trying to be strong for you, goddess. I don’t want sex to muddy what we’re building. I want your feelings to grow between us without you getting confused whether or not it’s only what I do to you physically that you’re falling for.”
“What?” she whispers, and I pull my head back just an inch to look down into her shocked eyes. “Is that why you haven’t touched me since you went down on me? You think I won’t know the difference between lust and love?”
“It’s not that I don’t think you’re smart enough to know—”
She shakes her head. “No, no, Neil. I’m not getting defensive. I mean, you truly think that I’m not already irreversibly in love with you already?”
My head jerks back another inch to take in her whole face. Her lips twitch into a shy smile. “You… what?” I shake my head.
“Viking, I couldn’t even make it through the whole day without going to see you at work when you couldn’t come work out during lunch,” she says with a little chuckle, and then her face grows serious. “I’ve always been in love with the idea of being in love, and then I was hurt worse than any woman ever should be, and I swore to never fall in love again. But what I felt back then, what I’ve felt since my first boyfriend back in kindergarten all the way up until him… I know now that was not love. Because I have no doubt what I feel for you is the real thing, and it feels absolutely nothing like anything I’ve ever felt before in my life.”
And just like that, my whole body goes lax, my weight pressing down on her as my cheek comes down to rest at the top of her breasts, and her arms come up to cradle my head to her. Her words took my breath away, and all the tension I carried, all the worry I had for her, wanting to heal her heart she swore would never be fixed, it all just… lifts and floats away.
My arms tighten at her sides as she strokes through my hair, seeming to know I need a minute for my world to stop spinning. I’ve never felt such overwhelming happiness and relief in my life, unfamiliar with the feelings since I was eighteen over twenty years ago. A part of my own heart feels healed like I was wishing for Astrid’s, and I just soak up the feeling of being held in the