I repeated, my voice hollow. Not nearly enough. Eternity won’t be enough. “I’m not sending you away, Rees.” Don’t go. Oh please, don’t go!
My qualms of the past few days had been meaningless. Eternity was worth nothing without my love by my side. Arrogant fool that I was, I thought I’d given him life when it was he who’d revived me. If he left, he’d rip my heart out. The heart I’d never known I had to begin with. My chest hollow again, I’d die the worst kind of deaths. The never-ending one only immortals could suffer—the grim, endless dying on the inside.
“Don’t leave, Rees,” I said, but my voice held no power. He ignored my plea.
“I want to ask you for a great favor,” he continued. “I know I’ve already gotten so much from you. You might think I’m greedy, and maybe I am. Yet I must ask.”
He was leaving. The beast inside me howled in pain, but I gritted my teeth. I’d grant him any wish. “Ask, Rees,” I forced out.
“I want to stay at your estate. Let me work for you, please, my Lord. If you let me, I’ll help with the horses. Jona says I’m a quick study. But even if I’m just to clean the kitchen or work in the field, let me stay. Please, I found a home here.”
I frowned. That wasn’t right. That couldn’t be what he wanted. Was it? “You want to work for me?”
“Yes, my Lord.”
“You’d stay at the cottages with my hunters and work for me. That’s what you want? Say the truth, boy.”
“I want to stay.”
“Why? Because of the horses? The tranquility? You want a comfortable life, Rees?” He had to answer.
“Yes, I…” He lowered his gaze. He couldn’t continue if what he was going to say was a lie.
I took a step closer to him, and my voice rose against my will. “Why? You can’t lie to me, Rees. You will answer.”
“I’m a fool, Cariad. I…”
“Why do you call me that name? What does it mean? Say it, Rees. Now!”
“The name means Beloved,” he whispered brokenly.
Two clear tears trickled from his eyes, running down his cheeks. He ground his teeth, took a strangled breath, and then he spoke in a tortured voice.
“I want to stay close to you. I love you, Cariad.”
The ghost of a heart in my chest throbbed with new life. He looked so small, kneeling far away from me.
“But I can’t wait naked in your bed every night, not knowing whether you come home or not. Not knowing whether it’s the last time you let me stay, the last time I get to touch you. I can’t…” He clenched his jaw.
The tears continued to trail down Rees’s cheeks, searing my mind with pain and guilt. I’d hurt him, and it was only right I’d ache for him. Yet the pain I felt watching him cry was exquisite. Beautiful and raw, a pain from which great happiness could be born.
“Stand, Rees.”
Chin held high despite his tears, Rees stood.
Holding his gaze, I went to him and knelt in front of him. He gasped and trembled, and I placed my palms on his thighs and stroked his legs.
“It’s me who is supposed to kneel by your feet, my love.” I rested my forehead against his belly. “This is my place, down here, at your mercy. You’re not supposed to beg me. You decide over me.”
His quivering fingers skimmed the fur on the back of my head, his touch unsure but hopeful.
“You can stay, Rees. You can stay however long you wish, and you can work in the stables, in the garden, or you can just be, left in peace. This is your home. This house, this room, this bed, it’s all yours. Even this heartless monster kneeling in front of you, begging for your forgiveness, is only yours. Everything I own and everything I am belongs to you.”
I kissed his stomach, then looked up into his stunned face and continued.
“Last week, for the first time in thousands of years, I slept. Holding you in my arms, I slept. You revived my soul. I taught you passion, but you taught me how to love. Every time we’re joined, and I heal your body, you bring me life. You are my life, Rees. Stay forever, darling. As my treasure, my soulmate.”
“Cariad…” he whispered.
“Stay with me, my heart.”
He sank down, straddling my lap, and he kissed me fiercely, tasting of tears.
I’d sacrificed my immortality. Yet it didn’t feel like a sacrifice