if there’s a but coming.”
“I just can’t, not right now.” Maybe never.
Before this thing with Rob, I had promised to move on. I couldn’t back down on that, either, even if something wretchedly vile had happened to me. I had to keep going forward, no matter how hard it was. I had to keep moving, or I would be forever stuck, stalling in this dark void that was my life.
My refusal didn’t seem to go well with him. “What do you mean, you can’t? Are you really dating Carter? Is that why you’re refusing me?”
He was getting aggravated, but I intended to keep my cool and composure. I wasn’t going to crack because he was starting to see me differently.
Fuck. Carter. Shit. Sorry, buddy, but I have to do this. Hope you understand. I sent a silent prayer as tried to match his serious gaze.
“Yeah, I like him very much.”
“It’s like that, huh?” he uttered through his teeth, displeased.
My eyes didn’t waver as he and I fought it out. It felt as if he was waiting for me to fess up my lies. I could feel his frustration and anger, but I wasn’t going to fold under his scrutiny, even though I thought the world of him.
“I’m curious to know; does he know you’re in love with me?” he spat out, unblinking.
“Really, Brody!” I hissed like he just burned me. “Fuck off!”
“Don’t bite my head off, Amber. I’m being serious!” He slipped from his chair and began to stand, as if his tall height could be used to intimidate me.
“Well, so am I!” I passionately shot back, almost slamming the coffee cup on the counter. “What I felt for you is not that important, not anymore.”
“Like hell it isn’t. He’s my best friend; it fucking matters.”
Point taken. However, he wasn’t going to get anything from me. I wasn’t going to melt and thaw from his intense look. I had made up my mind where he was concerned. And even though I was glad he was trying to reach out at my weakest point, nothing had really changed. He was still in love with Lindsey. Nothing could ever change that.
“Just drop the subject, Brody—”
“I will if you go out with me tonight.”
Letting out a deep, guttural growl, I pleaded with him. “I can’t. I’m just not … I’m not ready. Everything’s too complicated.”
He immediately became silent, eyeing me as though he was seeing me for the first time. “Okay,” he finally whispered.
Uh, how could he change his tune that quickly? He was confusing me.
“I’m going to let this subject go, for now.” He made sure to emphasize his point. “But rest assured, I’m not giving up on you. Think whatever you like, Amber, but you and I have history, and I’m going nowhere until we settle this unfinished business.” With those parting words, he left me with my mouth semi-hanging ajar.
For the first time, Brody had left me speechless, and I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.
Chapter Seventeen
After our heated exchange in the kitchen, I didn’t see Brody for the rest of the day. I wasn’t sure if that was intentional or not, but whatever it was, I was grateful for the short reprieve to do some food shopping.
My first stop was Whole Foods then Trader Joes. The guys’ staples at the house were bread, beer, apples, and bananas. Oh, let’s not forget coffee and milk. Apart from those, the fridge was practically bare of food yet fully stocked with imported beers.
If there was something I could do to help out in the house, I could at least try my hand in cooking. Although I wasn’t the best of cooks, I wasn’t against purchasing some cookbooks and starting out with simple dishes, so I made sure to have a good selection of protein, veggies, and fruits.
Before returning to Carter’s, I made sure to purchase some pastries to drop off at the children’s ward at the hospital since I had promised Trista and Emma that I would. They were involved with the kids there, and since they weren’t here to do it themselves, I had to make the rounds and check in to one of the nurses, the most beloved Flo.
I was friendly with her, but I kept my distance. After what had happened last week, I was weary of being touched by anyone. The imbedded fear that they would hurt me was what Rob had scarred me with, and I had to learn how to live with