jeans around his ankles, while Lucas simply rolls his eyes.
“Fucking warlocks,” Cassian grumbles as he struggles to pull them back up.
I giggle, and Joshua’s face softens at the sound. He winks at me.
“Until we meet again.”
And this time, I actually believe him.
Chapter 56
I spend the next week at home, attempting to process all that occurred. Nana tells the school that I’ve come down with a stomach virus, and since I’ve never missed a day, they don’t question it. I don’t know what the guys told the school, but all four of them stay with me.
I alternate between crying, screaming at nothing, and staring blankly into space. Sleep proves difficult for me. Every time I close my eyes, I see Emmett’s malicious, cruel smirk as he hovers over me, that damn knife raised in his hand. And then the scene changes, and Gabriel’s bloody head fills up my entire vision. Then I think about the people I killed, and it only serves to increase my queasiness.
I usually wake up and vomit into the nearest trash can.
Nana calls me on the fourth day to tell me that it’s done. I don’t need to be a mind reader to understand her ominous words. Nana officially disowned Darlene as her daughter, and my mother lost all of her magic. I don’t know what this means for my family, but I do know that I can never forgive the woman who gave birth to me. I always knew she was cruel and conniving, but this is something else entirely. What she did…it was evil. No amount of groveling will ever get me to forgive her, though I doubt my mother will ever stoop that low. I hope I never see her face again.
Through it all, the guys never leave my side, comforting me when I need them to and holding me when I don’t have the strength to stand. One of them always stays next to me, as if they’re afraid I’ll shatter if they leave me alone. And maybe they’re right to be afraid. After all, they can feel my emotions just as I can sense theirs. I’m a tumultuous mixture of pain, fear, anger, and guilt. Mixed in that toxic cocktail is something akin to hope. Happiness. Elation.
The Devils are mine, now and forever. How can I not feel a little happy?
But then the guilt overpowers that positive emotion, and I succumb to my internal darkness once more.
It’s on the following Monday when I decide I’m finally ready to head back to school.
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Karsyn asks softly. Lucas is showering in the downstairs bathroom, while Elias is in the upstairs one. Cassian is still asleep in my bed in the attic.
“I need to live my life again, Kar,” I whisper, holding my mug up for him to refill with coffee. The Devils and I…we have become strangely domestic. You can tell that you care about someone immensely when you change your habits a little bit to accommodate theirs. For example, I guarantee you that a week ago, Cassian would’ve never willingly loaded the dishwasher or cleaned up after dinner. Or Lucas, the silver-spoon baby, would’ve never cooked dinner for all five of us while Nana and her men were still away.
But they knew what I needed even before I did. So while those two made sure I was fed and the house was clean, Elias held me in his arms on the sofa, while Karsyn put on a stupid romantic comedy. And then the next day, when I had a panic attack because I missed two tests while I was away, Lucas sat with me at the table and helped me with my schoolwork, while Cassian rubbed my tense shoulders and Karsyn swept the kitchen.
I’ve never felt so loved or cherished before in my life.
“You’re the bravest person I know, Simone.” Karsyn gives me a cheeky grin, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. I hate that I’m making him sad, but I don’t know what else to do. He’s always been the more sensitive Devil, and I know my emotions affect him more than they do the others. I can see it in his pained eyes, his tight smile, and his clenched jaw.
“Back at you, Alder.” I shove his shoulder lightly with mine.
He hesitates briefly, staring at his own steaming mug of coffee, before meeting my eyes.
“I went to see my doctor yesterday,” he blurts, and my eyebrows raise at his abrupt topic change.
“And?”
“And…” He bites