ready for your big move to Houston.”
“Wait…you want me to actually leave?” I question, shock consuming me. “Like, leave Vermont and go back to New York? Without you?”
“Yeah.”
“Ava…” I start to ask, but I don’t even know where to begin. I can tell her emotions are scattered all over the fucking place. And let’s be real, being a flight risk is what she’s known for. When things get too scary or too intense or too daunting, she runs.
Even she knows that fact.
“Just go, Luke. I’m overwhelmed and confused, and I need space from you. I can go to my sister’s wedding by myself, and when I get back to New York, we’ll talk.”
“Don’t do this, Ace.” I reach out toward her, but it’s useless; she steps away from me. “Please don’t do this.”
“Don’t do what, Luke?” she spits back. “What am I doing?”
“Pushing me away.”
“Says the guy who led me on for weeks, knowing that soon, he would be moving across the fucking country.”
“You know that wasn’t what I was doing. You know—”
“I know that you lied to me.” She shakes her head. “That’s what I know.”
Fuck. “Ava, don’t make it like this.”
“Actually, you made it like this,” she retorts and grabs her purse off the nightstand. “And if you don’t mind, I’m going to take my dad’s truck and get some fresh air. Have a safe flight back to New York.”
“You’re fucking serious?” I question. “You just want me to leave? Like, right now? Without you?”
“Yes, that’s what I want. I need space to get my head together. I’ll see you in New York in a few days.”
I just stand there, and it feels like my jaw drops through the fucking floor.
And then she up and walks out of the bedroom.
I hear her footsteps move down the stairs and the front door slam shut and the engine of her father’s truck start up.
And when I look out the window, I have the painful view of her leaving.
Leaving her parents’ driveway.
Leaving me.
December 30th
Ava
“Oh Ava, honey, have you lost weight?” my aunt Lily asks as she checks the fit on my bridesmaid dress. I stand on a step stool in the middle of my parents’ living room, and her fingers tug and pinch at the fabric around my waist.
Considering I haven’t been able to eat anything since I told Luke to leave yesterday morning, it’s possible I’ve lost a pound or two.
But I don’t tell her any of that.
“I don’t think so,” I lie out of self-preservation. There is no way in hell I’m going to tell her what’s really happened. For all my family knows, Luke had to leave yesterday because he was called in to work because another pilot was sick.
Why do they know that? Because that’s what I told them when my dad noticed he hadn’t seen Luke around and wanted to thank him for finishing up his Christmas décor cleanup.
The fact that he even did that for my dad makes my heart feel like glass, ready to shatter with each thick breath I inhale into my lungs.
You really screwed things up this time, didn’t you? my mind taunts me. You freaked the fuck out, and instead of being a rational adult about things, you told him to leave and stormed out of the house like a child.
I wish I could say I stand behind yesterday’s behavior and feel strongly that I handled it all correctly, but I can’t.
After I rushed out of the house, Luke tried to call me and text me at least a hundred times. And all I did was sit in my dad’s truck in a Walmart parking lot, bawling like a baby, only sending him one single response back.
I just need space, Luke. Just go back to New York, and we’ll talk when I get back from my sister’s wedding.
It was horrible. All of it.
And late last night, when I finally went back to my parents’ house and Luke’s stuff was out of my bedroom, I got one final text from him.
I just want you to know that I’m getting ready to board a flight back to New York. It’s the last thing I want to do, but it’s what you want. And fuck, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Ace. I wish you would just talk to me and let me explain, but I’m going to honor your request of needing space. Even though it makes me feel like I’m leaving my heart in Vermont.
The instant I read it, everything I had just