completely silent and dark.
Quietly, I head upstairs, more than ready to climb into bed.
But when I step into Ava’s bedroom, shutting the door behind me, I’m shocked to find a naked Ava sprawled out over the comforter and sheets.
Goddamn. She’s beautiful.
And apparently, very awake. Her blue eyes meet mine, and a slow, slightly lazy, definitely sexy smile spreads across her lips.
“I’ve been waiting for you,” she says, and I can tell by her eyes that she’s definitely had a few drinks tonight. Not outright drunk, but certainly buzzed.
“Is that right, Ace? You’ve been waiting for me?”
“That’s right.” She nods and sits up on the mattress, her knees slightly spread and her feet tucked beneath her bare ass. “Get naked, Luke.”
Well, fuck.
“A little bossy tonight, aren’t we?” I question, but my cock has already made the decision for me, hardening beneath the zipper of my jeans.
Without delay, I slip off my T-shirt, my boots and socks, then my jeans and boxers.
“Yes, please,” Ava whispers, staring at my cock. “Get in bed with me, Luke.”
I smirk at that, but I don’t falter to oblige her request. I climb into bed beside her and pull her sexy little body over mine.
She giggles and grins and spreads her thighs over my hips so that my cock rubs against the spot where she’s already warm and wet.
Fuck, she feels so good.
Ava kisses me, her lips frantic and greedy, and I moan, my fingers gripping her hips in excitement. She rubs her body against mine, desperate for me to slip my cock inside her, but I choose to spread it out, delay the gratification.
“I’ve been waiting all night for this,” she whispers against my mouth.
“Me too.”
“Let’s do this forever, Luke.” Her blue eyes meet mine. “Me and you and a lifetime of just doing this.”
And for the second time in the span of twenty-four hours, those words are the dart, and my heart is the fucking bull’s-eye. The impact is staggering and serves as a painful reminder of everything I haven’t told her. The fact that she is going on the assumption that once we leave Vermont, we’re both headed back to New York without any other plans. Not the reality that I’ll only be in New York for a few short days before I’ll be leaving. For good.
Fuck.
The pain is acute and urges a knot to form in my throat.
I want her so bad.
I need her so bad.
She is the fucking world to me. I’m certain I’ve loved Ava for a very, very long time, probably since that first day, when she came barreling into my life. But I can’t do this, right now, with her, no matter how badly I want her.
It just feels wrong, like I’m purposely lying to her.
So, I do what feels like the impossible.
I don’t let us have sex.
Instead, I do my best to convince her that I’m tired, turn us on our sides, and keep her body cuddled against mine until we both fall asleep.
Thankfully, her slightly inebriated state makes it easy to persuade her.
But my stone-cold sober state does me zero good.
For hours, I lie wide awake, thinking about the fact that tomorrow I have to tell her the truth.
December 29th
Ava
The morning starts off…strange.
There’s no cuddling or sweet kisses or soft and sleepy smiles.
Luke is out of bed before me, already in the bathroom brushing his teeth. And when I slide out of bed to greet him, he hardly reacts. Just a simple peck to my forehead and then he’s off again, out of the bathroom and back into the bedroom, leaving me standing there feeling…confused.
I try to brush it off, I really do, but memories of last night filter into my brain and remind me that it isn’t just this morning. He’s been off since he got back from Zach’s bachelor party late last night.
I pretty much threw myself at him, and at first, he seemed into it, even taking his clothes off to get in bed with me. But as things got more heated, something changed, and he just shut down, putting the kibosh on sex by giving an excuse of being tired.
Which, fine. I mean, it was like three in the morning, and I was definitely a bit buzzed from all the booze and Kate’s bachelorette party. Truthfully, my alcohol-fogged brain didn’t even think too much about it before drifting off to sleep.
Until now.
I step out of the bathroom and find Luke sitting on my bed, scrolling through something on his phone.
“What do you want