she wasn’t happy when she hung up.”
“You can say that again. My ex and I don’t agree on much, but we’ve done well at supporting each other’s parental decisions.”
“How long have you been divorced?”
“Nine years. You?”
“How did you know I was divorced?”
“Eve might have mentioned it.”
I forced a smile. “Sorry about that. She means well. But she insists I need to get back into the dating world even though it’s only been eighteen months.”
“Would I be overstepping if I asked how long things weren’t great before the divorce? For me it was at least five years. So when we finally split up, it had been a long time since either of us was happy, and we were both ready to move on.”
“I suppose you’re right. We were separated for two years before the divorce, and things hadn’t been great in a while.” My phone buzzed in my hand, and I looked down.
“Do you want to take that? I can go grab us some drinks. How about a refill for that margarita?”
“I’d love that. Thank you, Adam.”
Returning to my phone, there were three successive texts from Donovan, a minute apart.
Donovan: Got nothing, huh?
Donovan: Admit it. You think I’m hot.
Donovan: Got a buddy who’s on NYFD. I can borrow his uniform if you go out with me.
Valentina: Sorry. I was talking with someone.
Donovan: Man or woman?
Valentina: Why do you ask?
Donovan: Because if it’s a man, I want to know if you think he’s hot, too.
Valentina: You’re pretty full of yourself, aren’t you?
Donovan: Me? You’re the one having hot and sweaty fireman dreams about me.
Valentina: I never said…
My texting was interrupted by another from him. He had fast fingers.
Donovan: Admit it.
Valentina: Why is it so important to you?
Donovan: Because I like you. And if you’re fantasizing about me, there’s a better chance I can talk you into going out with me.
I really wished he were a bit older—even just a few years and into his early thirties would be more appropriate.
Valentina: I like you, too, Donovan. I don’t want to lead you on. I’ve enjoyed this time chatting with you…I really have. But you’re just too young for me.
Donovan: I’m actually not that young. I did some serious thinking about this yesterday. The average life expectancy of a man is 68.5 and for a woman it’s 73.5. That means you’re probably going to live five years longer than me. Therefore, I have a 5 handicap.
Valentina: A handicap?
Donovan: Yeah. Like in golf. I get to add five years to my age. So we’re really only seven years apart, and you can certainly get past that.
I chuckled and shook my head.
Valentina: Nice try. But your logic is flawed. We measure life by how long we’ve been here. Therefore, you receive no handicap.
Donovan: It’s time you changed that outlook, Val. Age shouldn’t be counted by the time we’ve been alive. It should be counted by the years we have left. Look forward, not back.
It was just a funny exchange. I didn’t think it was meant to be profound or anything of the sort. Yet his words hit me. I had been looking back, for a long time now. Donovan was right.
I gulped back the rest of the margarita in my glass and stared at my phone for a long moment. The party was going on all around me, yet everything was suddenly quiet.
I was single.
I hadn’t been happy in a long time.
My son was a grown man and no longer needed me.
Pretty soon, I’d be making a major career change.
Why was I constantly looking back at my failed marriage?
Valentina: I might have daydreamed a little about how you would look in a fireman’s uniform. And…
I took a deep breath.
Valentina: If you still want to go out on a date, let’s do it.
Donovan: You just feel bad for me because I’m going to die five years earlier, don’t you?
I laughed out loud. It felt good. Like taking in a deep breath on the first day of spring.
Valentina: I just had an epiphany. I’m looking forward now. And forgetting all my self-imposed rules of the past.
Donovan: Now you’re talking. When do I get to see you in person?
Adam was heading back my way with a filled margarita glass.
Valentina: Can we talk tomorrow? I’ve been rude to the gentleman who just fetched me a drink.
Donovan: Gentleman?
Valentina: Yes…Adam.
My face brightened at yet another forward-thinking thought. Only this one, I probably shouldn’t have shared with Donovan. I was just so damn excited, though.
Valentina: Maybe I’ll go out with Adam, too! Chat