was pretty sure that if I hadn’t been Micah’s fiancé, he’d have said something different, because once Rush Callahan died, his small police force wouldn’t feel compelled to keep manpower at the hospital. I could have told Al that I didn’t have to be babied, but if Micah was with me, then we’d need it; better to get in the habit now.
There was a moment of uncomfortable silence as all the policemen knew exactly why Deputy Al had hesitated, and everyone wondered whether to say something or let the silence spread.
‘It’s okay, Al, I know that it’s a matter of time for Micah’s dad, unless we get a miracle.’
‘Do you believe in miracles, Anita?’ Al asked.
I nodded. ‘Yeah, I do.’
Rickman snorted. ‘Miracles are for Sunday school and Christmas specials. I’ve been a cop too long to believe shit like that.’
I started to say something, but Dr Shelley beat me to it. ‘Be cynical on your own time, Ricky. I want Rush to have his miracle and get to see his son married to Marshal Blake.’
‘Not going to happen,’ Rickman said.
‘Ricky,’ Gonzales said in a low, angry voice, ‘you are not going to kill Rush before he’s dead.’
Rickman looked shocked, and again he didn’t know what he’d said wrong. I was wondering if there was maybe something socially wrong with the detective, beyond just being rude. ‘I didn’t mean anything, Ray, I … I want Rush to make it, too, but facts are facts.’
‘Fuck facts!’ Gonzales said, and he loomed over the detective. Ricky was six feet, the same height as Gonzales, but somehow the sergeant dwarfed the detective. Gonzales did what some people could do, he just seemed bigger. I was told I could do it, too, but I didn’t have Gonzales’s size, so it couldn’t be as impressive.
Burke didn’t step between them, but he moved up sort of halfway between where each of them was standing. ‘Detective Rickman, go somewhere else away from Sergeant Gonzales for a while.’
‘I’m sorry, Ray, I …’ Rickman shrugged, shook his head, and finally just walked away, but I was betting he was clueless on why the other man was rigid with anger.
Gonzales’s voice crawled out of his chest, thick and dark with rage. ‘I won’t give up on Rush. I do believe in miracles, because I have to.’
I reached out to touch his arm and then stopped myself. Sometimes, when you’re angry enough, any physical contact escalates the rage. I didn’t want to do that, so I let my hand drop back to my side.
‘I believe in miracles,’ I said.
He rotated his neck as if the muscles hurt to move, so tight with the tension in his shoulders, and that movement alone let me know how close he’d come to hitting Rickman or how much he’d wanted to do it. ‘It’s all Rush has got.’ It was a growl.
‘Let’s you and me get some coffee in the cafeteria,’ Al said. He gave a small nod to let me know to leave him with his friend. Since I had no clue what to do for Gonzales and I was supposed to be here as moral support for Micah, I let Al take care of it. If I was hand-holding anyone emotionally it had to be my ‘fiancé.’
Burke walked me out through the last doors and the hallway beyond. Ares and Bram pushed away from the wall, going from at ease to at attention. Neither of them had been out of the military that long. They’d come back to the hospital just in time to trail me with the police. Micah had told me to take them because the police would be more comfortable with two ex-military guards than with Dev and Nicky’s more civilian-muscle attitude. He’d been right, but the fact that he’d thought of it in the middle of the family chaos made me hug him tight and feel bad that he was having to think about anything but his dad. I looked at the two tall, slender, muscled men, one about as dark as he could get, and the other all honey and golden blond, even his tanned skin. I saw them so often together that I’d started thinking of them as a unit, the way you think of some couples, never alone, but always two. They’d traded military backgrounds with the police, and it had helped put the other men at ease. None of the guards were going to make Micah’s family comfortable with their son, brother, cousin, and nephew needing