in a little, so it’s now nearly ten.
“Shouldn’t you be at work?” I ask.
“I’ll work from home today,” he says with a shrug. “It’s more important that we deal with this now.” He pauses. “If…that’s okay?”
I smile at his lack of certainty. “That’s okay.”
He grins at me. “Good.”
I munch on some toast as he makes an appointment with the doctor for the afternoon, losing myself in my thoughts until he hangs up.
“Alright, that’s arranged, so we’ll be able to get more advice,” Jason says with a nod. “Now, we need to talk about work.”
My stomach lurches. “You said my job was safe.”
“Of course it is,” he says. “What I have to talk to you about is what the next few weeks will hold. We’ve discovered that our overseas branches are losing profits, especially those in Europe. It means I’m going to have to do a trip over there to introduce myself soon.”
If I was ever in doubt about my feelings for Jason, they were silenced at this exact moment. My heart falters at the thought of him going away.
“Of course,” I say, trying to keep my voice even. “You’re the new boss of the company. You need to greet them in person sooner or later.”
“Yes,” Jason says with a nod. “And I’ll need my secretary with me, if you feel up to it?”
My heart jumps again, but for a very different reason.
“Yes,” I blurt out. “Of course. Europe is amazing, who wouldn’t want to visit?”
“Hopefully by the trip, your morning sickness won't be as much of a problem,” Jason says, grinning widely at my acceptance. “I’m glad you’re coming. I didn’t even want to think about trying to take a substitute for you.”
I laugh, smirking. “I’m sure you could have found someone suitable.”
Jason’s smile drops. He leans in closer, and a shiver goes up my spine at the way his gaze holds mine so intently.
“There’s no one suitable to replace you,” he says.
I can’t look away. Here and now, the can of worms that we’ve both been ignoring has been opened. We’ve skipped around the subject, but now we need to talk about ourselves.
I asked last night. But we were both tired, and it wasn’t the right time to discuss it. I completely agree with Jason shutting down conversation at that point.
Now part of me wishes to rewind and prevent the conversation for just a little while longer. The air between us tenses, and I suddenly don’t want to do this.
But I have to. Jason and I owe this to each other after everything that’s gone on between us the last few weeks. Jason made the first step, last night, by confessing his feelings for me. Now it’s time to respond.
“You said you love me,” I say, and Jason nods, never looking away. “I…”
“It’s okay,” Jason says gently. “I just wanted you to know, so that you know I’m not going anywhere. I’ll always be by your side, for as long as you allow it.”
For a split second, I wonder what I did to deserve Jason. Weeks ago, I would have wondered the same thing with disgust, half of me believing that this was some sort of cosmic punishment. Now, however, I wonder with awe, certain that this is some sort of reward for getting to this point in my life. He told me about his mother’s death a while ago, before I found out I was pregnant. It goes some way toward explaining why he’s changed so much since college. Until recently, I still had my doubts about how genuine this change in him was. But something as traumatic as that is bound to change anybody.
“Thank you,” I say, and my voice sounds thick. Fucking hormones, messing with all my emotions. “I can’t respond to you the way you probably want me to.”
“I don’t expect you to,” Jason returns quickly.
“I know,” I say with a small smile. “But I do want you to know… I do have feelings for you. I don’t know what they are yet, but…”
But they make me feel helpless and strong, they make me feel like I’m soaring through the air, like I can do anything I put my mind to. I don’t know how to put this into words, but maybe Jason understands a little because his eyes widen before he nods slowly.
“What now, then?” he asks.
What now, indeed? What do I want? Jason has made his feelings on this matter clear. He wants a relationship with me. He wants to be with me,