both my arms over my head, and the shadow of his wings blanketed us both in darkness. His power shoved me deeper into the floor, so strongly I could barely move, the countless rivulets of inky smoke spreading over me and on the floor around me until I felt like I was falling into shadows, suffocating in them. I screamed and swung my head side to side, yanking my arms down and kicking my legs, but he wouldn’t give an inch.
“Let me go!” I shrieked the words over and over until I stopped thrashing. I shuddered and lay still, breathless and voiceless from exhaustion. My lips moved, but nothing came out except for tiny whimpers.
“Ellie.” His voice was soft and cracked with pain as he pressed his forehead to mine. “Ellie, please. Stop. Please, stop.”
I went limp heavily, sobbing, my lungs and throat shredded. His grip loosened, but even though I stopped struggling against him, he didn’t release me.
“Ellie, please. Please, stop fighting me. Please, stop.”
I stared out at the desolate desert of snow and ice that covered the lake behind Nathaniel’s house. The wind blew cruelly, pitching up clouds of white powder and casting it toward the trees and the porch where I sat. I pulled the blanket wrapping my body tighter and didn’t push my hair out of my face as it whipped around my head. I barely noticed the frigid air, since I was already so cold inside.
“Ellie,” Lauren said as she slid the porch door open. “You’ve been out here long enough today. You’re going to freeze to death.”
I didn’t reply. She hesitated for a few seconds before going back in and shutting the door behind her. It wasn’t long before the door opened again and I sensed Will. I ground my teeth together to keep myself from shouting at him. He stepped slowly across the porch and knelt in front of me, resting both his hands on the sides of my chair. I glared down at him, and he only gave me a gentle gaze in return.
More memories flooded my head, and I buried my face in my hands, whimpering. “Go away,” I snarled hoarsely.
“You need to talk to me.”
I dropped my hands. “I’m telling you to go away.”
His mouth tightened in frustration for a split second. “Please, Ellie, come inside before you freeze to death.”
I snarled and spoke slowly, emphasizing each word so he knew that I was dead serious. “You framed my real father for my mother’s murder. If you don’t get the hell away from me right now, I’m going to punch your head right off your shoulders. You know better than anyone how capable I am of that.”
After a long, painful moment, he stood. Instead of looking up at him, I stared at the snowy porch floorboards.
“I am sorry, Ellie,” he said, his voice cold and formal. “But everything I do is to protect you at any cost, even if it means sacrificing your father’s reputation. I’m sure he was a good man, but for years the thing you knew as your father wasn’t him. It is a tragedy what happened to your family, but you have to understand that we cannot risk exposing our world to the human world. I hope one day you will forgive me.”
I looked up to meet his steady gaze. Our world. My family was my world. This nightmare I fell into the day I turned seventeen could never change that. I wanted to fly to my feet and hit him and scream at him, but it would do me no good. In truth, I was terrified of letting my emotions go. I’d lost control of my power for the first time in a long time, and from what little I could piece together from my memory, I’d hurt Will and Nathaniel. I’d hurt them badly, and I felt terrible for it. But my regret couldn’t make me forgive Will for what he’d done to my father’s name.
His gaze narrowed and darkened at me. “Your mother fought like hell for her life, and here you are ready to throw your own away.”
He turned and walked back into the house.
I didn’t follow him. I pulled out my phone. There were eleven voice mails. All of them were from Kate, one of my only remaining ties to the human world. It was just me and the darkness now.
My mother’s funeral went by in a haze. Fake friends and family I’d forgotten I had all attended, shared their condolences,