low ache through my body. I put my hands on his arms, and my grip tightened briefly before I reluctantly pushed him back. He broke his kiss and met my eyes in confusion. I swallowed, hoping my actions told him what I didn’t want to say with words. That kind of closeness wasn’t what either of us needed right now. It was painfully difficult to refuse him then, but it was for the best. This wasn’t the right time.
The rejection melted away from his face, and he looked down at me soberly. I pressed a gentle hand to his chest and guided him to the bed. I climbed in, my fingers loosely entwining with his, and he followed me, crawling under the blankets with me. Within moments it was plenty warm, and with the door shut, no icy drafts blew into the room. I could hear the wind picking up outside, whistling by the window, and as Will settled down and I laid my cheek on his chest, his heartbeat became the only thing I could hear. By some miracle, he fell asleep, and I followed him soon after.
When I woke, Will was gone. I found him sitting on the swing bench overlooking the lake. I had wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and now lifted it at my feet so the ends didn’t drag in the cold, wet grass peeking through patches of melted snow. He sat in silence, leaning forward on his elbows, his lips brushing his knuckles. Something was clasped between his hands, and a delicate gold chain slipped through his fingers. He didn’t seem to be looking at anything in particular. For a moment, I regretted intruding on him, but he didn’t need to be alone. Not right now. Neither of us did.
“Will,” I said gently as I approached him. He didn’t look up. “Can I sit down?”
His hesitation made something ball up in my throat. “Of course.”
I eased into the seat beside him, studying his profile and furrowed brow. I wouldn’t ask him if he was okay. Of course he wasn’t okay. Nathaniel was dead. I gazed at his hands. “What’s that?” I asked, indicating the chain.
He sat back, exhaling, and opened his hands. It was my lost pendant, unharmed except for the broken chain. He held it out to me and I took it.
“You found it.” I clutched it tightly to my chest. It warmed almost on contact. “Thank you.”
He said nothing.
I put the necklace in my pocket for safekeeping. I’d have to get a new chain soon. “What are you doing out here by yourself?”
His expression softened, and I was able to feel better about intruding on his solitude. “Coming up with a plan.”
I sighed. That was the Will I knew, always focused on the future and never the past or present. It was easier for him to focus on something other than Nathaniel’s death.
“At least Bastian is out of the way,” I offered.
He didn’t answer or acknowledge what I’d said. Perhaps now I understood what Will had been feeling all along, the frustration and need to be there for me when he was unwanted. I didn’t want to be unwanted now, and neither did he.
“What should our next move be?” I asked.
“We lie low,” he said, surprising me. I think I expected him to demand that we eat a feast and march off to war at dusk. “Azrael came in at the right time, but Sammael also underestimated us. He will not risk making another mistake and losing you a second time. He has been dormant for thousands of years and could still need time to recover his strength, just as you do each time you’re awakened. Azrael’s glory weakened him, so we may have bought some time.”
I gaped at him. “Why are we letting him get stronger? We should take him out now while he’s weak.”
“Because we can’t beat him,” Will said firmly. “I am just a reaper, and you have a breakable human body. We will never be able to beat him or Lilith. He is one of the Fallen and the Right Hand of Lucifer. There’s no way anything besides an archangel could obliterate him. We need Azrael. We need the Destroyer.”
“But Azrael is an outcast,” I said, perplexed. “He’s not an archangel anymore.”
“He’s defeated Sammael twice already. He can do it again.”
“What if he can’t?” I asked. “He couldn’t kill Sammael last night, only hold him off. What about Michael?”
He shook his head. “Michael can’t engage until there