to.
I reached up and tucked a piece of hair behind my ear before tapping a fingernail on the dark screen of my phone. “I’m just a little bit tired. I knew this movie was going to be emotionally draining, and the character was going to take a lot out of me, but I think it’s more exhausting than I anticipated.”
Arrow nodded, a small frown pulling her brow down. “Even watching from the outside, it seems pretty intense. You and Salinger look good together, though. I’m not sure how much of what you’re portraying is real and how much is just acting. You play off one another really well, even with such a heavy subject matter.” Her expression smoothed out, and she wiggled her eyebrows at me in a playful manner. “I bet all the romantic scenes turn out fire. If you guys have that kind of chemistry for the regular scenes, the kissing and sex scenes are going to be next level.”
I wrinkled my nose and tapped on my phone even harder. “There aren’t actual sex scenes.” There were a couple of tasteful romantic interludes, though. “But the intimate scenes are usually so awkward and uncomfortable. I don’t think I feel as anxious as I usually do since I’m pretty familiar with Salinger.”
I knew what it was like to kiss him. To touch him. To taste him and hold him. I knew what it was like to hear him growl my name in that super sexy way he did right before he came. I knew his ears were ticklish, and that his neck was an extra-sensitive place on his body. There wasn’t a single part of him I hadn’t had my hands or mouth on. But none of that knowledge helped me figure out why he’d gone from pushing me for more than I was willing to give to being totally hands-off and treating me almost like I was a stranger whom he was worried about offending.
I was fairly certain I had no one to blame for the change in our relationship but myself. Once again, I was overly cautious where he was concerned, not only because of what happened in the past, but because I was starting to see a future with Salinger. And after everything blew up with Erik, the last thing I wanted was another problematic man taking up so much space in my life. Even though I logically knew Salinger was tying himself into knots trying to fit into the minuscule spot I’d given him. He wasn’t trying to be any more or any less than what I allowed him to be, and it was possible he’d finally had enough of the emotional acrobatics.
Arrow hummed in agreement and pointed at the laptop sitting in front of her. “Do you want me to order something for dinner? You have an early call time tomorrow, so you should go to bed early and try and relax a little bit. You look tired.”
I made a face at her, but I knew she wasn’t lying. I felt tired. I was forced to spend a few extra minutes in hair and makeup today to cover up the dark circles under my eyes. I couldn’t keep going like this. I needed to figure out what I was doing with Salinger in a big picture kind of way before I went crazy and ended up looking like I aged a hundred years overnight.
“I was thinking about calling the boys and seeing if they wanted to have dinner with us.” I watched as her expression turned sour before she could cover it up. Both Arrow and Jeno were young and had kind of a punk rock vibe. I figured they would get along well, especially since Jeno came across as a generally laid-back kind of guy. Much to my surprise, my assistant and Salinger’s brother took an immediate dislike to one another. The animosity had been apparent from almost the second they met, so it’d been interesting, and often entertaining, to have the two of them on set at the same time. Even though they were there for Salinger and me, they spent most of their time verbally sparring. I’d asked Arrow what it was about the tall, tattooed young man that rubbed her the wrong way, but she’d yet to give me a clear answer.
“I’ll skip that. I’m not really hungry. I just wanted to make sure you ate something and got plenty of sleep because I know you’ve been working hard and